July 5, 2023

 

Free in Christ

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened against by a yoke of slavery. – Galatians 5:1

 

We are free to love Jesus. We are free to live according to His Word. We are free to love others and to worship and to grow more Christ-like. We are NOT free to condemn those who are different. We are NOT free to judge what we don’t understand and to choose who we think is worthy of His love and a place in Heaven.

 

We Christians are really good at pointing fingers. We stand up and talk about how we’ve prayed and come to the conclusion that certain people are condemned. We pray and justify our own black hearts not realizing that we have condemned ourselves.

 

My grandmother truly believed that the Bible said whites are the superior race. The Bible doesn’t say that but no one could ever convince her otherwise. I tried. I see the same thing happening today with other issues and it breaks my heart. Haven’t we learned anything?

 

Jesus doesn’t need you or I to help Him judge people. In fact, He told us we would be judged the same way we judge others. No excuses. So what did Jesus tell us to do? Love people. Be good to our enemies. Really pray for people.

 

Here’s the thing about prayer: We don’t have to know what to pray for. We don’t need to tell Jesus what someone else should do or how they need to behave or repent or whatever else we’ve decided is their issue. He knows what all of us needs. He alone truly knows the heart of each individual.

 

Don’t let anyone cast judgement on you from a biblical standpoint. No one but Jesus gets to tell you what the Bible really says and what it doesn’t. If a “Christian” gets on his high-horse and starts pointing fingers, point them right back. Odds are pretty good that he doesn’t know what the Bible actually says.

 

The Bible was never intended to be used as a weapon but rather as a tool to help us know God and follow Him. Don’t allow others to pull out verses or words and use them as weapons against you or anyone else. Christ set you free from the bondage caused by others. You believe and trust Him to handle the rest.

January 28, 2023

 

How Did Jesus Do It?

 

“But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” – Luke 6:27-28

 

Oh, Jesus! How did you do it? How did you love people intent on betraying you? How did you forgive people intent on destroying your temple for money and power and greed?

 

It’s not as though Jesus didn’t know. He did. He chosen the twelve. He broke bread with all of them, including Judas, knowing that he’d be betrayed for 30 pieces of silver.

 

Money. Why does it seem like all these years later it still controls the hearts of men and women who proclaim the name of Jesus and still seem intent on betraying him? Will we “sell” our church for the privilege of excluding people made in His image?

 

Disaffiliation from the United Methodist Church has nothing to do with Jesus and the Bible. It has everything to do with men and women who are afraid of anyone who might be different. It’s about power and control. And let’s not forget money. Because those with the most money have the power and control of the church. No female preachers. No homosexuals. No to anyone who might look different than them.

 

And, yet, Jesus loves them. He calls us to forgiveness. He tells us to pray for them. He commands us to do good to those who would harm us. I look around at all the false disciples and see heartache and betrayal. Jesus sees those created in the image of God.

 

 It’s not too late. I remind myself that God can make a way when no way seems possible. I search scripture for passages of His Glory showing up at the last minute. I know this battle isn’t about buildings and endowments. I know it’s about souls and eternal life. This battle isn’t mine to fight.

 

Still, I struggle to do my part. I don’t want to love people who seek to harm our family. That’s what it is. Family. Now it’s torn apart and, regardless of the disaffiliation vote, nothing will ever be the same. Maybe that’s the point. Maybe Jesus wants to make us broken bread so that He can remold us into something far better than we could ever have done ourselves.

May 15, 2018

When Ugliness Takes a Fall

When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly. – 1 Peter 2:23

His mugshot was grainy. Dull. His expression was one of shock and disbelief. He’d skirted the law many times, hurting others and lying. He’d spewed ugliness, assuming he would never get caught. Until one day, he was.

There was no satisfaction in it. Not for me, anyway. Only a deep sadness that he still hadn’t changed. That’s the way of evil. It gets worse until one day goodness stops it cold.

It would be easy to gloat or cheer or let my heart be filled with satisfaction. I don’t know if the arrest has caused him to rethink his behavior or if he’s still blaming everyone else for his choices. Only God knows the truth of a person’s heart.

My hope is that his present reality causes him to reevaluate his choices, to turn toward Jesus, to invite Him into his heart. God loves this man just as much as he loves you and I. We forget that sometimes when our only focus is exacting revenge on someone who has harmed us.

It isn’t always easy to pray for our enemies but that is His calling on our lives. We are to do good to those who harm us. He tells us to love everyone, even those who have hurt us deeply. It isn’t an easy road but, then, His way rarely takes the easy path.

Sometimes it’s through grace and mercy, the same grace and mercy God shows to us, that others can clearly see Jesus. Don’t rejoice in the tribulations of others. Instead, pray that hardship will finally draw them home.

July 9, 2018

Are You Christ’s Enemy?

For, as I have often told you before and now tell you again even with tears, many live as enemies of the cross of Christ.

– Philippians 3:18

Who do you most admire? Who do you want to be like? Who makes you want to be more than you are today?

Some, wanting to answer correctly, will mention Billy Graham or another great pastor. Others, not understanding the point, will talk about their parents or teachers or other great influences on their lives.

But there is only One that stands above them all. There is only One whom we should admire and strive to be like. Jesus. He is our example of how we should live.

We don’t see ourselves as enemies of Christ. But how many times each day do we deny Him by our actions or our words or our attitudes?

We make excuses. We tell ourselves and others that “It’s just my opinion.” Or “I really don’t like her (him).” Or “I’m just so tired. I’ll skip church so I can sleep in.” Or “I really need some time off and Sunday is the only day I have to go fishing or to the beach or for a bike ride.” Need I continue?

What do you prioritize? What comes first in your life? Who matters most? What would you do to defend them, to spend time with them, to enjoy them? Where does Jesus fit in all that?

I know. I’m asking a lot of questions. It’s not until we ask ourselves some tough things, and give honest answers, that we come to understand that we really can be enemies of Christ without even realizing it.

Their destiny is destruction, their god is their stomach, and their glory is in their shame. Their mind is set on earthly things. – Philippians 3:19

We become so focused on ourselves that we forget that our focus should be on Him. We are so intent on what we believe that we forget our beliefs should reflect Him. We are so hardhearted that we condemn those we don’t know and judge hearts we can’t see.

And how dare anyone threaten what we think belongs to us. We don’t want to share. We just don’t. We declare our rights as American citizens, as hard workers, as defenders of the constitution. We cling tightly to things of this world, never really considering that we aren’t citizens of this world.

We demand that what others have be given to us. We don’t intend to make sacrifices. We want the best without having to go above and beyond ourselves to get it. No. I’m not talking about welfare recipients, illegal immigrants or the disabled. I’m talking about you. There’s a lot of abuse of our system, a lot of people taking advantage of government programs. I see it everywhere. And you know what? Every single instance of it belongs to someone loftily looking down on those they consider to be lazy and undeserving. They condemn people who are truly in need in a disgusting attempt to justify greedily taking advantage of the system themselves.

Are you denying Jesus? Are you His enemy? Think about it.

February 19, 2018

Trust God

The one who conceals hatred has lying lips, and whoever utters slander is a fool. – Proverbs 10:18

He is a friend, a relative, a co-worker. She is a neighbor, a fellow parent or church member. You think you all get along. While you aren’t super close, the relationship in your eyes is friendly and warm.

Then you find out – quite by accident – that you’ve been unfriended on Facebook. You ask a few subtle questions of mutual friends. Nothing. Do you start a conversation with this person? Do you just let it go?

It stings. There’s no way around it.

Then there’s the person who spends his days bashing you. Never to your face, of course. He’s so sweet and kind. You almost believe his lies. Except for the people who ask if you know what he’s saying behind your back. It happens once, twice, numerous times.

You could confront him. What’s the point? He is following a pattern of behavior he’s engaged in throughout his life. You’ve heard him bash others the same way he is now bashing you.

What bothers you the most about it all is the hypocrisy of it. That’s especially true when the offender is a fellow church member or someone who loudly proclaims his faith to the world. You wonder if anyone else sees the trouble with someone who is nice to your face and yet slams you behind your back.

One man is such a public Christian. He can quote the Bible verse after verse. He offers up the most beautiful prayers, being sure to lay hands on people and proclaim their healing. He is quick to teach, to save souls, to proclaim all God has done for him.

His life behind this persona is totally different. Those who have known him long and well just shake their heads. They hear the lies and have for as long as they have known him. They don’t miss how he takes credit for things only Jesus can do. As one relative said, “The devil quotes the Bible too.”

He is a snake, waiting in the grass to attack his unsuspecting victims. His mouth runs wild with venom, lies designed to destroy. All in God’s name of course. And all behind the back of those he claims to care about.

It’s never easy to feel the sting of rejection and betrayal. Understand that it’s not about you. And know that it doesn’t come from God. You can face the situation and try to resolve it or you can simply let it go. Forgive and move on, being ever watchful for the next attack.

People who think it’s okay to slander people behind their backs are fools not worth knowing. Don’t stoop to their level. Don’t retaliate. God is the defender of His children. Keep your own counsel, venting only to God. Trust that He will handle it because He will.

May 5, 2016

Treat Your Enemies Well

“But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” -- Luke 6:27-28

Have you ever had to regularly deal with someone who hates you? Maybe a co-worker? Or another church member? (That happens more often than we like to admit.) Or maybe it’s a family member?

It’s hard to love someone who hates you, isn’t it? It’s hard to pray for people who are lying about you and trying to harm you. It’s difficult to do good and be kind to someone who wishes you were dead.

Yet this is exactly what Jesus tells us to do.

Do they deserve it? No. But neither do I deserve His love, forgiveness, and grace. I remind myself of that regularly, as I struggle with these words of Jesus.

Jesus was telling the Jewish people to treat the Romans who oppressed them with respect. He no doubt lost a few followers over that one. We don’t want to be kind to people who wish us harm.

It’s understandable. Our human reflex is to fight, to defend ourselves, to lash out with words that refute their lies. And then it escalates. No one wins. Everyone loses. And you are left more broken than before.

So you remain silent. You walk away from the conflict. You do good where you can. You stay strong, not because you are strong but because God is strong.

This is where you take it all to Him. You get down on your knees and, in the words of one Bible teacher, you tattle on the person who seeks to harm you. That’s right. Tell God all about it. Pour out your hurt and your anger, rant about the unfairness of being blamed for someone else’s mistake. Tell God how upset you are that someone else took credit for your idea.

Then get up and leave it with God. That’s the hardest part. Leaving it with Him and trusting Him to take care of it. Sometimes I think that’s the only way to get through it all is to know that God will always avenge those who belong to Him. Always. His Word is so clear on that. Be patient. Do your part to follow Him and trust God to fight for you.

January 11, 2015

Be Kind

 

"But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you."

-- Matthew 5:44

Some people are just hard to love. They are. And yet we are called to love them anyway.

I am participating in a church-wide study on what it means to be a church member. Today's topic was on unity. Don't gossip. Be kind. Be compassionate. Don't always expect to get your way on music, sermon times, budget matters or anything else.

It also means forgiving people who have done you wrong, whether they know it or not. Because sometimes people hurt us without even realizing that they have done so. And sometimes they do it intentionally. That brings me back to my original comment: Some people are just hard to love.

Many of us have folks like that in our lives. It might be a church member who criticizes everything. It could be a co-worker who always takes credit for your work. It might be a neighbor who lets his dog poop on your lawn -- again and again. It could be a family member who is so self-focused that he or she can't see anyone else.

There are no easy answers. No quick fixes. No magic wands to make it all better. Sometimes we can distance ourselves from difficult people. Sometimes we are well and truly stuck. Such is the case with family members. That includes our church family.

As members of the church, we are all humans struggling to get it right. And failing every single day. How we treat others, how we build unity within, reflects outward as well. There are few things as sad as a church split apart by dissension. If we can't get along with each other, how can we love and tend to a hostile world? We can't.

Jesus tells us to love everyone. Kindness deflates more anger than attitude. Compassion turns more hearts than harsh words. Love reflects Jesus. It's that simple and it's that hard.

We'd at least like for difficult people to acknowledge that they are difficult. We'd like for them to appreciate our efforts. They don't. Because they don't see beyond themselves. Do we want to be like them? Or do we want to be like Jesus?

So let it go when someone is critical. Refuse to participate in gossip. Be kind to those who don't deserve it. Why? Because Jesus has been kind to us and we don't deserve it either.

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Do Good To People Who Harm You

“But if you are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies. Do good to those who hate you. Pray for the happiness of those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you. If someone slaps you on the cheek, turn the other cheek. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also. Give what you have to anyone who asks you for it; and when things are taken away from you, don’t try to get them back. Do for others as you would have them to do for you.” -- Luke 6:27-31 (NLT)

The other day two friends and I got to talking about people who use other people. You’ve probably got someone like that in your life. They take advantage of your generosity, your good will, your time and talents. And when you finally tell them no, they leave in a snit as though they are the wronged party.

It’s actually kind of funny -- so long as you’re aware of the situation. As one friend said, she knew all along that the person was using her. She let it happen because she was doing something she wanted to do. And when she didn’t, she just said no. And now the person isn’t speaking to her. Oh, well. My friend isn’t shedding any tears.

As God’s people we are called to do good to other people, including those who hate us, hurt us, curse us, and worse. It’s the love we have for those who wrong us that sets us apart from others.

It isn’t always easy. In fact, sometimes it’s absolutely hard. Especially when people get upset and angry with you when you won’t do what they ask.

Another friend has struggled with doing God’s will and not being taken advantage of and used by his neighbor. The man uses people and brags about it. My friend is tired of always being called on to be his driver. I don’t blame him. It sounds like his neighbor has crossed a line and my friend is in danger of being an enabler.

Because as much as we want to help people, as much as we are called to do good, we also want people to help themselves. We want people to take responsibility. And we don’t want people to have an attitude when we have to say no, even if it’s something that we want to do.

Yeah, there is that. Sometimes we have to say no even when it’s something we really wish we could do. And those who are users, as opposed to simply people we love, are the ones getting all upset because they didn’t get what they wanted from us.

And still we do good. We love. We care. We help where we can. We try to treat them as we wish they would treat us. Again and again. Because it’s what Jesus would have us do.

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Do Good To All People

“But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” -- Luke 6:27-28

Nobody was in agreement. There was a bit of polarization. Some heated words. Some of us shaking our heads. It’s just what happens when you put 12 people with diverse backgrounds and views in a room and tell them to make a decision.

One woman -- one of those take charge folks -- brought up the second commandment. She looked at me, no doubt taking in the silver cross I wear most everywhere. I fought back a chuckle. She wanted us to love everyone -- so long as everyone agreed with her.

I let it go. There was no point in a Bible lesson during a jury deliberation. But it was just so typical of how we view love. We want to love those we want to love. And we want to hate, or at least dislike, those we don’t want to like. And we want to pretend that Jesus never told us to love our enemies and to do good to those who hurt you.

I’m not saying it’s easy. It isn’t. Some days are all about forgiving, over and over again. And praying for those who harm you. Again and again and again. Because some hurts never seem to end and some people never seem to change. But it really isn’t about those who harm us. It’s about our relationship with God.

We were an odd assortment of folks. The unemployed man, with the foul mouth and worse attitude. The young girl, barely 20, who was so impressed with herself. I wanted to tell her she didn’t know a fraction of what she thought she did but I figured she’d learn that herself over time. We all do.

The quiet jury foreman seemed intelligent, well-spoken, reasoned. Two women barely said a word. Another bemoaned the state of our sue-happy society. Reasonable damages. Nothing excessive, just because some wanted to reward the underdog. Just the facts.

Another woman had an attitude about the defendant. She didn’t like him and didn’t mind showing it. He was arrogant, she told us all. Cocky, she said. I wondered what, or who, had hurt her so badly. Because her attitude had nothing to do with the case.

Isn’t that how it often is? We have an attitude with someone because of something someone else did to us. We dislike a company because one employee was incompetent. We leave a church because one person hurt our feelings. Or we look down on someone because of their address, the color of their skin, the car they drive or their financial status.

Love your enemies. Love those who are different. Embrace those who disagree with you. See good, even if you have to search for it. Because we all have good in us and we all have bad.

“Do to others as you would have them do to you.” -- Luke 6:31

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Be The Very Best You

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful,
I know that full well. -- Psalm 139:14 (NIV)

“Why can’t you be like that?“ “Why can’t you do that?“ “Look how pretty she dresses. You should get her to help you.“ “Maybe if you worked harder you could get a job (or a man or a life) like that.”

Hurtful comments meant to sound helpful while slamming the other person as not being good enough. Why do some people incessantly need to “fix” or “change” the people around them?

Of course, I use the term people rather loosely. It seems that in every crowd there’s one person who does the bulk of the “fixing” and another who gets the brunt of the attacks. Every time I hear of another school shooting I wonder if the shooter was someone whom others thought needed fixing. I am not saying it’s okay. Obviously, it’s not. I just try to understand the depth of pain that would lead a kid to take a gun and kill other kids.

Maybe it’s something else. Someone once told me that when someone needs to fix or change those around them, it’s because they’re unhappy with themselves. I believe that. I do. It just doesn’t make the pain hurt any less.

This Scripture reminds us that we are wonderfully made by a God who loves us. We were created in His image, each uniquely formed to reflect a wonderful light outward. Do we mess up sometimes? Absolutely. Are we sinners? Without a doubt. But we are also wonderful just the way we are.

Whenever a nasty comment heads my way, I instinctively want to lob an assault right back. I’m good at it too. I don’t say that proudly. It’s just that I’ve had a lot of experience over the years. I went from silent victim to pointed tongue defender. Pain has a way of bringing out the worst in us.

But God says to pray for those who harm us. To turn the other cheek. To forgive again and again. And so I try. I must, just as you must. Because otherwise the pain is too much and the built-up anger and resentment eats away at our souls. Then we’re no good to anybody, especially God.

These days I try really hard to take a deep breath when someone lobs an insult my way. I don’t want to let that person draw me in to that hateful place of anger and resentment. I try to either ignore it or diplomatically deflect their words. I tell myself their opinions really aren’t worth getting upset about.

God made me in His image. He created me to be the person that I am. And I’m going to do everything I can to be the very best me I can be. So should you. So should you.

Friday, February 3, 2012

Pray For Those You Dislike

Live in harmony with each other. Don’t try to act important, but enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all! -- Romans 12:16

Everyone knows someone that you’d really rather not be around. It could be a co-worker. It might be a neighbor. It could even be someone you see at church or on the golf course.

Maybe you don’t actually hate this person. Hate is such a strong word and we know that’s something we really need to avoid. But you don’t really like the person either. Maybe there’s nothing specific you can point to, just a feeling.

Or maybe this person has really done you wrong. Maybe he/she took credit for your idea at work. Maybe he/she borrowed something and never returned it. Maybe he/she has lied to you numerous times. There are good, valid reasons why you’d rather not be around that person.

But we’re supposed to live in harmony with each other. And I don’t think we’re necessarily supposed to do that by avoiding people. Now don’t get me wrong. I’m not talking about people who are abusive. Those folks need to be in jail. I’m referring to your average person that we encounter in our lives.

What would happen if you actually prayed for the people you don’t like? You’d be amazed at how you start seeing their good qualities when you do. Prayer changes people, especially the person who prays.

You could also pray for those who have done you wrong. Pray that they see the error of their ways, that God shows them His love, and that YOU love them with agape love no matter what. You didn’t expect that last part, did you? When someone does us wrong we must forgive and let go or it will destroy us. The Bible clearly tells us to do good to our enemies.

One of the most difficult things to do is to pray for someone we don’t like. Sincerely pray, I might add. But doing so over time changes us. We start praying out of duty or because we “should.” Then somehow it becomes something we really mean. We want God to speak to that person’s heart. And we want God to speak to our heart as well.

God can heal relationships in ways we never think is possible. He can show us good where we never thought it might exist. God can change our hearts even as we pray that He touch the hearts of those we’re praying for.

So next time you’re tempted to avoid someone, trying praying instead. You’ll be amazed at the change prayer can bring in both

Tuesday, December 3, 2012

God Protects His Own

The LORD is my strength, my shield from every danger. I trust in him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy. I burst out in songs of thanksgiving. -- Psalm 28:7

Last year was one of those years I’d really rather not repeat. Nothing especially bad happened. Nothing especially good happened either. It was a year when joy seemed to evaporate even as new, wonderful challenges emerged.

Have you ever been surrounded by people who wish you harm? Maybe a co-worker or family member? A neighbor or former friend? You forgive and you forgive but the strain of it all takes an emotional toll. It just drains your energy.

David understood. He’d done all he could to support Saul and yet this man was determined to kill David. It’s easy to say Saul was possessed by Satan or he was insane. Probably both. But those things didn’t negate David’s very real danger or his anguish at constantly being on guard for the next attack.

Sometimes I feel ridiculous. It’s so easy to laugh off one small incident. Maybe even two or three. But one by one they add up and one day you look around and you aren’t laughing anymore. Because it isn’t funny. It’s sad. And it hurts. Do you understand? Have you faced that kind of enemy? Maybe you’re facing that enemy now.

God gets it. He understands. He strengthens me. He strengthens you. He shields us from danger and fills us with joy. It’s how we can face each day. It’s how we withstand the barbs and lies, the backstabbing and insults.

I’ll probably never really understand why some people need to cut other people down to feel better about themselves. And I’ll never understand why some people lie easily and don’t seem to think anything is wrong with doing so. But I don’t have to let their actions destroy me. Neither do you.

God sustained David. His love filled David with joy. And it can fill us with joy as well. We can withstand anything because we know that God has already won the war. He has defeated the enemy. God will protect us from those who seek to harm us. Trust Him. He won’t let you down.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Find Rest In God

They (enemies) plan to topple me from my high position. They delight in telling lies about me. They are friendly to my face, but they curse me in their hearts. -- Psalm 62:3

How many times are we supposed to forgive someone who hurts us? How many times are we supposed to show mercy to someone who has betrayed us? How many times are we supposed to turn the other cheek when someone spreads lies about us?

As many times as it happens, for as long as it happens. That is so not what I want to hear. How about you? It just seems there should come a point when we get to shove back but that’s not what God says. But He also says He’ll take care of it. I do trust Him on that.

I also realize that I should forgive others no matter what because God has forgiven me, no matter what. And I know I should show mercy when others wrong me because God has shown me mercy when I have wronged Him. God takes me back and forgives me no matter how many times I mess up. I try to stay focused on that when I’m struggling to hold my tongue and not retaliate against my enemies.

Maybe it would be easier if my enemies were people I rarely see. Isn’t it easier to let things go when it’s someone we don’t deal with often? But that’s not usually the case. Because those distant people don’t have the power to wound us like the people close to us have. They don’t know the buttons to push. They don’t know where the open wounds lie.

There is one safe place to take all this anger and disappointment. There is one place to lay all the hurt and the bitterness. At God’s feet. He’s the only one that really gets it because He sees and hears it all.

Some days I’d rather just run away. It would be easier, don’t you think? Okay. Running away from situations doesn’t solve anything or change the reality. Some people are just not trustworthy. Some people are jealous, no matter the circumstances. Some people lie just because they think they can. I can’t change them and neither can you. Only God can work a miracle in people like that.

So I struggle with my own heart. I don’t want it to harden so much that it no longer feels the joys of life. But I want to protect it from the constant heartbreak. Isn’t there some middle ground? I sure haven’t found it yet.

Most days the criticism just rolls right off. Years of experience has taught me to let it go. Have you reached that point yet? It really is the best way to go. Not that it always works. There are days I just feel so raw, every nasty word just seems to rip me apart inside.

Unhappy people seem to find solace in making those around them unhappy too. But no one can take from me the joy I have found in Jesus. There is a peace in knowing that no matter what the world delivers, there is rest in the shadow of His wings.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

God Alone Sustains Us

I wait quietly before God, for my salvation comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will never be shaken. -- Psalm 62:1-2

Who let you down this week? Who disappointed you? Who hurt you? Who betrayed you? Who lied to you? Who attacked you? Who destroyed your faith in them and, maybe, in yourself?

That’s the problem with trusting other humans. We all disappoint each other, all the time, every day. We’re selfish and inconsiderate, prone to speaking before we think and being irritable with those closest to us. It’s normal. And it hurts.

That’s one reason I love God so much. He loves me when I’m unlovable. When I’m tired and irritable. When I’ve been criticized one too many times. When I’m defensive. When I mess up -- again. When I say the wrong thing -- again. God always loves me. I don’t know why. I tell Him that again and again. But He does. There is security in that. In knowing that no matter what, God loves me. And you. He loves you just the same.

He is also my fortress when I’ve just had too much of life. God holds me close when my feelings are hurt. God soothes my soul when I’ve been betrayed yet again. God gives me hope when the days seem to drag on and I don’t see any different or any better. God hears my cries. He hears my laughter. He sees my hopes and dreams and cheers me on, even when He knows I’m likely to fail yet again. Isn’t it wonderful to have someone who is always in your corner?

Maybe that’s part of the problem. We expect humans -- people just as flawed as we are -- to be totally accepting, totally truthful, totally supportive. And when they aren’t, it hurts. Just like it hurts when we aren’t who they want or need us to be. But we’re expecting people to be like God and that’s just not possible while we walk this earth.

We’ll never reach a point when other people don’t hurt us and disappoint us. So what are we to do? Turn to God. Lean on Him. Depend on Him. Believe Him. Oh. That’s the key. Believe God over the lies of people who betray us. Believe God when our world is crashing down. Believe God when He tells us we can find rest in Him. We can find Healing in Him. We can find hope in Him.

So stop expecting people to be what they’re not. Focus on God, who is who He says He is

Thursday, September 22, 2011

God Defends His Own

“O our God, won’t you stop them? We are powerless against this mighty army that is about to attack us. We do not know what to do, but we are looking to you for help.”

-- 2 Chronicles 20:12

It takes a while to get to this point. For most of us anyway. It’s when we’ve exhausted every avenue, tried every thing we can think of, and still face certain defeat. Then we give up and give it to God. Finally.

We like to fool ourselves most days. We want to believe that we’re in control. We make decisions and dance around the constraints of life. We believe we’re doing okay. Then something or someone just knocks us down. We struggle to get up again but we’re shaky at best and wounded deep inside.

We don’t know what to do. How can we possibly win a battle against someone so evil? How can we forgive and yet still stand against a formidable opponent? Where can we turn when it seems like the world is more than we can handle?

God is waiting for us to reach this point. He’s right there. He never left us. Not for one minute. God was just waiting for us to cry out to Him. Sort of like a small child toddling forward until he stumbles and cries out. Then his loving parent swoops in to pick him up and set him on the right path again.

God is our Father. He is loving and kind. Full of mercy and understanding. And quick to defend what is His. And we are His. God sees our broken hearts. He feels our tears. He soothes our anger. And He remembers our pain.

One of the hardest parts of life for me is dealing daily with people who don’t like me. I am a necessary appendage they’d rather not need. But they do need me. That need, however, doesn’t stop the lies or the barbs or the pain of cruelty. I’d rather throw in the towel. I’d rather just let someone else do it. I’d rather not face another day with its unpleasant surprises.

But God has called me to this time and place. I am doing what I must for as long as I can. I don’t know what else to do. I don’t even know how to do this. Nothing prepared me for this.

So I turn again to God. This is His battle. This is His lesson. This is His journey for me. I have no idea where I’m headed. Oh, I know heaven is on the horizon. But for here and now, I don’t know what tomorrow will bring. Jesus said not to worry. That’s not so easy to do some days.

Still I am confident that God is mightier than anything anyone can do to me. God is looking out for me. God is preparing me. And God will sort it all out. Come, God, please come. I don’t know what to do and I really need your help. He hears my cry just as He hears yours. Go forward confidently, knowing that your Father will help you

Monday, September 12, 2011

Walk Away and Let God Handle It

When a man’s ways are pleasing to the LORD, he makes even his enemies live at peace with him. -- Proverbs 16:7

How well do you get along with people you don’t like? Do you walk away and refuse to deal with them? Do you barely tolerate their presence and make sure they know it? Or do you smile, determined to be nice no matter what?

Few things in life are certain, but one thing you can count on is that someone is always going to disagree with you. It could be what you say, how you do something, even what you’re wearing. Someone is going to have a problem with it and, sometimes, it’s going to seem really, really personal. Their attitude reflects them. How you deal with it reflects you and, because you’re a Christian, your actions also reflect on God.

“But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” -- Luke 6:27-28

It really hurts when people don’t like us. It especially hurts when someone pretends to be a friend or supportive co-worker and then turns on us. With people you know don’t like you, there’s always that guardedness we keep in place to help protect ourselves. That’s not the case when it’s someone close to us. The pain is quick and deep.

Retaliation comes immediately to mind. They deserve it. And, frankly, we want to lash out when we’re hurt and betrayed. It’s harder to take a deep breath and pray for that person. It seems impossible to hold our tongues until we remember that we can do anything through Christ who strengthens us.

Honestly, people don’t know how to act when they do something awful and we don’t retaliate. They’re shocked. It’s a wonderful time for them to understand that Jesus is the reason we’re living differently than them. This doesn’t mean to let someone abuse us. I’m not talking about that. It means realizing that truth wins and vengeance belongs to God.

The LORD says to my Lord: “Sit at my right hand until I make your enemies a footstool for your feet.” -- Psalm 110:1

God knows everything. He sees everything. He’s going to take care of His children. That’s right. He will take care of us. And He will make things right in our lives. Maybe not in that moment, or even that week, but God always stands by His children.

Trusting God when we’re hurt isn’t easy. We want to handle it ourselves right then. But sometimes how we handle it only fuels the fire of anger and betrayal. No one wins. But walking away and letting God, means that it will be worked out for the best. In His will. In His time. Hold your tongue, refrain from retaliation, and trust God.

　

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

 

Pray For Your Enemies

“But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you!” -- Matthew 5:44

Who are your enemies? Who wants to hurt you and harm you? Who wishes bad things would happen to you? If you can’t think of someone, count yourself fortunate. Most of us have a list and that’s pretty sad.

It might be a co-worker who’s jealous and afraid that you will somehow diminish his/her position. Or that person may want your job or believe that you’re standing in their way for a promotion. This type of vicious competition only hurts everyone involved, including the employer.

Some enemies seem more natural, if there is such a thing. Your ex-spouse wishes you would just go away. There are constant fights over the kids, spousal or child support, and perceived wrongs. Then all the extended family gets involved. You just wish everyone would get along and get over it. Nobody wins with all the constant bickering

And let’s not forget your family. They can be the worst because they have the ability to hurt you the deepest. We don’t often think of family members as being enemies but they can be. When someone seeks to hurt you, they’re your enemy. When someone puts you down and tells lies about you, they’re your enemy. Having a family tie doesn't change that fact.

But love them anyway. That’s what Jesus told us to. We’re to pray for those who hurt us and would destroy us if they could. We’re to forgive. We’re to give them as many chances as it takes for God to, hopefully, change their hearts.

 “If you love only those who love you, what good is that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that.” -- Matthew 5:46-47

Jesus never said following Him would be easy. Honestly, it’s difficult to pray for people who hurt you. It’s hard to forgive, especially when you know they’re probably going to do it again. Yet, that’s what Jesus tells us to do.

There have been times when I’ve had to force myself to pray for my enemies. I’ve had to tell God I was praying for them in protest. They didn’t deserve my forgiveness. And, yes, He reminds me that I don’t deserve His forgiveness either.

Then a funny thing starts to happen. The longer I pray, the calmer I feel. His peace fills me and my prayer turns more sincere. I do want good to surround those who wish bad things for me. I want them to know Jesus, really and truly in their hearts, so they can understand that life isn’t about being first or best. I want them to believe that you don’t need to knock someone else down to build yourself up.

So, pray for your enemies. Do good to those who would harm you. Do it again and again, for however long it takes for them to understand that love matters more than anything else.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Let God Handle It

Do not hate your brother in your heart. Rebuke your neighbor frankly so you will not share in his guilt. Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD.

-- Leviticus 19:17-18

It is normal to want desperately to lash out when someone hurts you. It is normal to want to hurt the people who hurt you first. It is normal to want revenge. What is normal, though, isn’t what we’re called to do. That’s the hard part.

We are to forgive. We are to move on. We are to be gracious and kind, compassionate even, in the midst of trials that sometimes know no end. Difficult? Yes. But necessary -- for us.

It is too easy to let ourselves be drawn into the hardness of the fight. We become like the people we so dislike in a vain effort to give them what we think they deserve. We forget to let God handle it. We don’t trust that He’ll do it as well as we believe we can. We don’t believe that God will stand firm and deliver a harsh rebuke to the person who harmed us. We don’t trust that He won’t show them compassion -- like He has shown us for our own transgressions.

Oops. Because we are all sinners. Sometimes in action. Sometimes in word. Sometimes in thought. Sometimes all at the same time. And God has shown us compassion. He sent His Son to die for us. Such love is beyond anything we can comprehend. Yet we’re called to understand and respond accordingly.

It isn’t easy. Sometimes forgiveness is a daily choice to give it to God. To pray for those who hurt you. To replace evil thoughts with scripture.

“But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.”

-- Luke 6:27

We always hurt ourselves most when we harbor hatred and ill-feelings. We become consumed with the person who hurt us rather than focus our lives on what is right and good. Our feelings become a burden that is so heavy we can’t move forward. We can’t heal. We are mired in an never-ending cycle that will slowly destroy us.

Unless we give it all to Jesus. Unless we place our burden at the altar. Unless we trust that God will take care of it in His own time and way.

Let it go. Day after day, if need be. But give it to God and let it go.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Keep Loving Your Enemies

"But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you," -- Matthew 5:44

It isn't always easy to care for those who wish you harm. Especially when they come at you again and again and again. I know Jesus is right. He's always right. But, oh, how hard it is some days.

I want to lash out when someone hurts me. Don't you? And I want to retaliate when someone harms me and tells lies about me. How about you? But Jesus tells me to love that person, to forgive and to show kindness and compassion. I struggle with it. I find myself praying that God will soften my heart and give me the strength to face what will almost certaintly be more pain and attacks down the road.

My tongue aches to lash out. I hold my peace most of the time. Few people know. I believe it's the way God wants it. Oh, how difficult it is. I want to shout from the rooftops, disputing the lies and allegations. I want to defend myself. I remain silent. I tell myself that the people who know me hear the lies and see them as they are. I look around. Maybe not. I stay silent anyway.

The stress gets to me some days. I pray that God will take the burden from me. I don't want to be angry. I want to let it go. That is easy to say but not so easy to do. I pray again and again for God to take this disappointment from me. How can one person be so mean?

In my better moments, I understand the jealousy and insecurity that fuels the lies and hateful comments. I know it isn't about me. It's about the person who lives inside her. I guess that's what God wants me to see. He wants me to look on her with love and compassion, the way He looks at her and at me.

So, I'll keep trying and stumbling and getting up and trying again. I want to let it go. I want to feel God's peace. I want to extend forgiveness for however many times it takes. And I want to keep praying that one day she'll understand that she doesn't need to lie and make hateful comments in order to think good things about herself. She doesn't need to compare herself to other people. God loves her. So I need to love her too.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Don't Respond To Enemies

"Hear me, O God, as I voice my complaint; protect my life from the threat of the enemy."

-- Psalm 64:1

Do you have any enemies? Probably. Most people do. Oh, you might not think of them as enemies. Maybe they're just people who don't like you (you probably don't like them either) or people who are jealous of you (co-workers or siblings come to mind). But, nevertheless, they are people who usually don't wish you well.

So what happens when those people are close to you? We want to let our guard down. We want to enjoy being around family members. But sometimes that isn't safe. I'm not talking physical here. That's a whole different thing. What I'm talking about are emotions. You know. That constant criticism that comes day after day. The little jabs. The put-downs. The snickers and insults. Taken alone, it would be easy to shrug them off. We're supposed to do that. It's not an easy task -- especially when it seems to never end.

I'm usually able to handle things that come from people I work with or interact with in business. I don't see those people that often. Really. Even when you're working a regular day, you've only got to tolerate stuff for eight to 10 hours, five days a week. Sounds like alot but it is doable.

Where I have trouble is in the close relationships. I hate having to hold myself back, to guard my comments, to temper my emotions because someone is just waiting for the opportunity to pounce. It hurts. Outsiders don't understand. They see the smiles and hear the lies. My skin has become fairly thick over the years but words still wound.

I want to run and hide. I want to throw in the towel and leave the mess to someone else. Haven't I suffered enough for one lifetime? Then I remember David. Saul wouldn't let up and David wouldn't answer the insults. David could have killed Saul but then David would have sinned. God took care of Saul in His own perfect time. I struggle to remember that. God's timing is not my own. He looks at the big picture while I am focused on the hurts of today.

I find rest in David's words and the knowledge that God sees and hears. He knows my heart just as he knows the hearts of those who would destroy me if they could. He'll take care of it in His own time and in His own way. I must find strength in Him to continue the journey He has called me to take and trust that the end will bring peace to me and glory to Him.