August 28, 2024

                Follow Jesus First

Am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.

– Galatians 1:10

What do you believe? What faith are you living? Do you even know?

Our country is so divided politically and religiously. Loud voices mock those who disagree with what they believe. Silence fills our minds as stress hardens our hearts.

It’s so much easier to go along with the crowd. I live in Trump country. I cannot understand the infatuation with a man who continues to lie, call others names, and basically bully and condemn anyone who dares to disagree with him.

Some of my Christian friends assure me that they aren’t voting for the man but rather the principles he follows. No abortion. Close the border. Balance the budget. Take care of the United States first and then Israel. No one else.

Except he isn’t doing that. His abortion stance? Let the states handle it. Close the border? He demanded that his followers in Congress vote against a bi-partisan bill to stop border crossings. Why? Because it looks better for him if the border remains wide open.

Balance the budget? Sure. But let’s not get rid of the pork. Let’s cut social security and any funds aimed at helping children. Let’s balance the budget on the backs of the middle class and poor while rolling out tax cuts and handouts to the wealthy.

Obviously, we all want to take care of our own country and our veterans. And we do support Israel – but not without conditions. The Bible shows us again and again that the Israelites do sometimes turn from God. We should never assume that blindly supporting Israel is what God wants.

We also shouldn’t behave as though we live in a vacuum not impacted by what’s going on around the world. We tried that once before. Then the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor and we were forced to look directly at evil and respond.

None of that is popular in the Deep South. But I’m not here to win a popularity contest. I am here to follow Jesus. So are you. 

Neither political party gets it all right or all wrong when it comes to following the Bible. But choosing to follow someone who arrogantly disregards basic character traits of a godly man isn’t the answer. It’s way past time that we stop blindly following men and start truly following our God.

July 5, 2023

 

Free in Christ

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened against by a yoke of slavery. – Galatians 5:1

 

We are free to love Jesus. We are free to live according to His Word. We are free to love others and to worship and to grow more Christ-like. We are NOT free to condemn those who are different. We are NOT free to judge what we don’t understand and to choose who we think is worthy of His love and a place in Heaven.

 

We Christians are really good at pointing fingers. We stand up and talk about how we’ve prayed and come to the conclusion that certain people are condemned. We pray and justify our own black hearts not realizing that we have condemned ourselves.

 

My grandmother truly believed that the Bible said whites are the superior race. The Bible doesn’t say that but no one could ever convince her otherwise. I tried. I see the same thing happening today with other issues and it breaks my heart. Haven’t we learned anything?

 

Jesus doesn’t need you or I to help Him judge people. In fact, He told us we would be judged the same way we judge others. No excuses. So what did Jesus tell us to do? Love people. Be good to our enemies. Really pray for people.

 

Here’s the thing about prayer: We don’t have to know what to pray for. We don’t need to tell Jesus what someone else should do or how they need to behave or repent or whatever else we’ve decided is their issue. He knows what all of us needs. He alone truly knows the heart of each individual.

 

Don’t let anyone cast judgement on you from a biblical standpoint. No one but Jesus gets to tell you what the Bible really says and what it doesn’t. If a “Christian” gets on his high-horse and starts pointing fingers, point them right back. Odds are pretty good that he doesn’t know what the Bible actually says.

 

The Bible was never intended to be used as a weapon but rather as a tool to help us know God and follow Him. Don’t allow others to pull out verses or words and use them as weapons against you or anyone else. Christ set you free from the bondage caused by others. You believe and trust Him to handle the rest.

June 20, 2022

 

Change Starts with You

 

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. – Galatians 5:22-23

 

What does kindness mean to you? If you are kind to someone else, do you expect accolades or at least reciprocation? Do you tell everyone about your wonderful deed?

 

What about patience? Are you patient with others as God is patient with you? Or do you get in a hurry, yelling and gesturing at other drivers or bad-mouthing the fast-food worker for not performing to your expectations?

 

Are you faithful to God ALL the time or only when it’s convenient? Do you show up for church, volunteer, tithe and study the Bible only when it fits into your busy schedule? Do you explain away your good intentions even as another week goes by?

 

We’ve all been talking about guns and gun violence. We’ve pointed fingers and blamed mental illness, all the while clinging to our own rights and views. We’ve told others they need to change but we refuse to open our minds to our responsibilities.

 

This is not where I lecture you on guns or the poor or even on going to church. I support the Second Amendment, giving to the poor and attending church each week. But mostly I advocate for change in how we treat other people each and every day. That’s where change starts. Not in Washington or in other political groups. It doesn’t even start in the “church” as we call it. Change begins with you and me and when we change, when we become more like Jesus, the world around us begins to change too.

 

Yesterday we studied the Fruit of the Spirit, found in Galatians. We didn’t focus on the things we shouldn’t do. Instead, we focused on what we as individuals could do to bring change within our own hearts so that it ripples out into the world.

 

Growing fruit seems so easy. Start with love and everything else flows from that. But we have trouble loving people who aren’t like us. We don’t particularly want to accept people who don’t look like us or talk like us or, let’s get real here, are born into our country to parents who have been here a while.

 

What would happen if we stopped judging people? What would change if we intentionally loved those around us, including those we don’t agree with and those who maybe haven’t met our expectations of what living a good life really looks like?

 

Jesus said we are the light of the world. Each day we have a choice. We can love and, in so doing, be living examples of the Fruit of the Spirit. Or we can remain self-focused, determined to keep our own best interests ahead of what God actually tells us to do.

 

Do you want to change what’s wrong with the world? Look in the mirror. That’s the person you start with.

March 3, 2022

 

What Are You Giving Up?

 

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.

– Galatians 5:22-23a

 

It is the season of Lent. We attended a beautiful Ash Wednesday service last night and it really got me thinking about what we give up for Lent. Or, perhaps, what we do for Lent.

 

Our church is reading the New Testament in its entirety during the 47 days leading up to Easter. The idea is that as we read and spend time in the Word, we’ll become more like the people of Easter. In other words, we’ll become more like Jesus and His early disciples.

 

Just before this passage on the fruit of the Spirit, Paul wrote about giving up the acts of the flesh. He included hatred, selfish ambition, jealousy, immorality and discord. He was telling us how not to live and then how to live.

 

So, I wondered what would happen if we gave up something that mattered to God?

 

What would happen if instead of trying to “fix” people who weren’t like us, we loved them like Jesus? How would our lives change if we sought joy rather than focusing on the negativity around us? Perhaps we could plant peace in our hearts rather than choose to lash out at others. Maybe we could be patient with those who don’t meet our expectations, just as God is patient with us. Maybe we could practice kindness to those we view as outcasts. Goodness could replace harsh words. Faithfulness could call us to worship God in truth and not just words. Gentleness might turn us toward compassion. And self-control could cause us to think about ourselves less and to actually listen to others before we judge.

 

I’m certainly not against giving up chocolate or soda, if that’s what you prefer. And we could all use less social media these days. But I wonder how highly God thinks of our “sacrifices” and our “discipline” when it does nothing to bring honor to Him or His Kingdom.

 

So, instead of going the easier route I challenge you to give up something that matters to God. Seek to truly live the fruits of the Spirit and, in so doing, shine His light for all to see.

November 13, 2019

Be Kind to Everyone

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. – Galatians 5:22-23

Kindness has become a “thing.” You know. It’s having a moment of popularity in a world that seems increasingly filled with violence and hatred.

Except kindness was always supposed to be a thing. It’s part of the fruit of the Spirit. It’s part of who we are called to be as children of God.

We know that. We do. Except for the exceptions. We don’t believe we should have to be kind – or nice – to people who aren’t kind to us. That whole love your enemies thing just isn’t reality. That’s what we tell ourselves and others anyway.

And surely we shouldn’t be expected to be kind to people who don’t have a job. We don’t need to know their story to understand that they’re nothing more than deadbeats expecting the rest of us to carry them. We don’t care what the Bible says about taking care of the poor. Surely God wasn’t talking about “those” kinds of people.

Let’s not even talk about being kind to liberals (or conservatives). They don’t have a clue of what it’s like to be a real Christian. They kill babies, give everything we’ve worked for to the poor and want to hand our country over to the communists. We don’t need to hear what they have to say.

We don’t need to bother with strangers. Why should we show kindness to someone we don’t know, someone who really can’t do anything for us? We’ll gladly help God’s people so long as they look, act and live like us. But only if we can give money. We’re just too busy to serve in any other way.

Anybody can show kindness to someone we know and love. We show our faith, we show Jesus, when we’re kind to everyone. Remember: It’s not about you. It’s not about me. It’s about Him. Every time you slight someone, look down on someone, or refuse compassion, you are doing the same to Jesus.

April 5, 2019

Please God

Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.

– Galatians 1:10

Have you ever tried desperately to please someone, only to have your efforts thrown back in your face? Yeah. Me too. People are fickle and the hard truth is that the more you try, the more you will fail.

The expectations of others demand a perfection that we simply can’t achieve. It’s unrealistic to expect that of ourselves. We aren’t God. We can’t meet the needs of someone else all the time. And you know what? God doesn’t expect us to.

Our lives are meant to bring glory to God. We can only do that when what we say and do draws others toward Him, not us. When we are trying to be everything for someone else, we are drawing them to ourselves. And we will fail them, either because their demands are unrealistic or forever changing or because we simply don’t have the resources to satisfy them. God is the only One who can completely fulfill all we need and desire.

There are so many words for this. Co-dependency or enabler come immediately to mind. Don’t let yourself be pulled into a hole that will destroy your self-esteem and leave you battered and ashamed. Don’t let others attempt to control you through guilt or nasty words.

We are called to please God. Period. That means that people are going to sometimes be upset with us for not following their plans and meeting their demands. Let it go. God has an amazing way of filling us up when we hand Him our brokenness. And who knows? Maybe walking away will cause them to seek God instead of you.

December 14, 2018

The Stench Tells the Truth

I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good.

– Romans 7:15-16

Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. – Galatians 6:7-8

Yesterday I once again had the opportunity to deskunk a dog. Actually, this time it was two dogs. I have lost track of the number of times my oldest dog has been sprayed by a skunk. This time he led his baby brother into the fray.

To be honest, this time the skunk got the worst of it. He lost his life. That doesn’t generally happen. But the rest of it was a repeat performance of the worst kind.

He knows what’s coming. No matter how many times he rolls in the grass and dirt, the smell remains. No matter how many times he tries to rid himself of the foul odor, it stays deeply present in his long fur.

That’s how it is with us. We sin and we pay the consequences for those sins. We say the wrong thing and people turn away. We do the wrong thing and people remember how deeply our actions hurt them. We don’t show up when we should and people understand how little we truly care.

We end up smelling foul in a way we never intended. We end up with consequences we never expected. But we should have expected them.

I have warned my dog again and again to stay away from skunks. He doesn’t listen. Experience hasn’t taught him anything. And, I suppose, it’s a whole lot better than when he takes on a snake. That almost gives me a heart attack. I try to see the positive in a bad situation.

But it doesn’t change the reality. Both dogs were confined to the backyard while I prepared a special concoction designed to rid them of the stench. They had to endure its application, wait for it to do its magic, then rinse and repeat. It’s December. It’s not a good time to be outside wet. It had to happen.

We face the consequences of our actions too. We can point fingers at others, we can make excuses, we can tell ourselves the odor doesn’t come from us. None of that makes it true. We reap what we sow. When we sow distrust and lies, we bear the consequences of those actions. When we sin, we feel the pain that comes when our sins are exposed.

Most of the time we know better. We understand somewhere deep inside that what we’re doing is wrong but we do it anyway. Just like my dog, we hope we won’t be found out but there’s just no chance our actions won’t reap consequences. It’s something to remember before we go where we know we shouldn’t be.

November 10, 2018

Your Choice

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. – Galatians 5:1

We are blessed to live in this country. We are blessed by the many freedoms we enjoy. We have the freedom to worship as we choose. We have the freedom to speak freely. Do we use that freedom wisely?

I spent the early years of my career as a journalist. That’s right. A newspaper reporter. In Mass Communications classes, we studied how tabloids can use words to manipulate the truth. It seemed so clear. In reality, it wasn’t. That’s why so many people bought tabloids filled with lies that were bolstered by tidbits of truth.

It breaks my heart to see that happening in such a widespread way. I know. People love it. They buy into the lies. In our deepest parts, we love gossip and the drama that it brings. But it is just so wrong.

The press corps has become filled with people who are out to make a name for themselves. They will report almost anything just because they can. It’s all about being first rather than being right. It’s that mob mentality that turns frenzied at the first sight of its victim.

President Trump fuels that. He’s good at it. He always has been. Except this isn’t reality television where ratings determine your success. This is real life, real people, real events. It’s not okay to use your power and platform to condemn at random and to spread lies when it’s convenient.

Christ died to set us free so that we could live like Him, not so that we could implode in a field of lies. We don’t get to pick and choose which parts of the Bible we believe. Either you love Jesus as He is or you don’t.

That means loving people, including people you disagree with. That means tempering your words, being kind and forgiving and merciful. It means standing up for what’s right, even if it steps on your own political toes. It’s not about you. It’s not about me. It’s about Jesus. When did we lose sight of that?

It’s hard these days to determine fact from fiction. There are some really good reporters out there who deserve respect from everyone. They try hard to get the story right. That means stepping on toes. That means upsetting everyone. Because when you’re walking that line of truth, no one is happy with you.

It would be far easier to gather a bunch of folks together, call them reporters or news anchors, throw out a few “facts” and let them hash out their opinions. Label it news and watch the ratings skyrocket. Most folks don’t bother to check out what they’re hearing or reading to make sure it’s truth. I suppose if something is said enough times people stop doubting its validity.

Christ didn’t set us free to spread lies and hate. Every time we watch a “news” channel that does that, we are betraying Him. Every time we “share” something without making sure it’s true, we betray Jesus. We spread hate and discord because the drama feels good. Otherwise, why would we bother to listen or read something that upsets us?

Lies beget lies. Hate begets hate. Jesus? Well, Jesus is all about love. You have the freedom to choose who you will follow. Will it be the world with all it’s anger and hate? Or will it be Jesus, who beckons us to love and care for others? Your choice. I pray you choose wisely.

October 25, 2018

Give and Receive

Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.

– Galatians 6:2

I am amazed. Thankful. Beyond grateful. Friends arrived to help me clear trees from the last two fence lines. They were amazing.

I didn’t ask for help. I have that pride thing going when it comes to that. I know. I’m working on it. I just don’t want to be a burden to anyone so I try really hard to handle things on my own. They came anyway.

It’s amazing how several people can quickly accomplish what it would take one person hours and hours to do. I think God always knew we’d need each other. He wanted us to reach out, to help, to live lives focused somewhere besides on ourselves.

We’ve seen a lot of reaching out lately in our part of the world. The aftermath of Hurricane Michael is just a news blurb for most people now. But for the victims, well, the nightmare has only just begun. The need is great.

People show up every day with food and water. They donate clothes and shoes, toys and diapers, towels and pillows. They come with chainsaws and work gloves, and buckets filled with cleaning supplies. Because these people need more than prayers. They need the hands and feet of God’s people.

We all need help at some time in our lives. Several years ago a sweet woman brought her three children to church every Sunday. Her son was in elementary school and she had twin infant daughters. They lived in a rural area. Her husband was deployed – again. She worked a fulltime job. She was overwhelmed. But she came to church. Why? Because for a couple of hours a week she could turn her babies over to the loving and capable ladies who volunteered in the nursery and soak in the peace of Christ.

One Saturday, the youth and several adults went to her house. They mowed and pulled weeds. They trimmed back trees and did numerous handyman chores. They did the things her husband would have done if he hadn’t been serving in a war zone. She was overwhelmed with gratitude.

Surely, she needed our prayers. And we all did pray for her and her children. But she needed help, the kind of help that shows up to rock babies and do yardwork.

Prayer is so very powerful. It’s our first line of defense and our first source of wisdom and direction. But don’t let it be your only outlet when it comes to serving others. Sometimes we all need to feel the physical presence of Jesus, as shown to us through the hands and feet of His people.

There’s a time to give and a time to receive. So give of yourself, your time, your efforts and, when your circumstances change, receive with gratitude and grace the offerings from others.

October 17, 2018

Help for Today and Tomorrow

Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. – Galatians 6:2

The local Emergency Management Agency was adamant. Do Not Go. Just don’t. At least, not without a plan. Register in advance and know where you are going and what you will be doing.

Everyone wants to help Hurricane Michael victims. There’s just so much devastation in such a large area. Do you go to Panama City? Do you head to Marianna or Gordon or any of the other inland towns that are devastated?

And what do people really need at this stage? Many don’t have toilets that flush, lights that work, nonperishable food, diapers and toiletries and, oh yes, water to drink.

The trouble comes when the influx of volunteers who don’t have a plan interferes with the recovery efforts of groups and agencies that are trying to set up a smooth, efficient organization to help people with the greatest needs.

Don’t get me wrong. They want help. They want donations. They want financial assistance to help pay for supplies and housing and other necessities for people who are desperate. But it needs to be done safely and efficiently.

Our church has been delivering supplies to devastated areas every day. Our associate pastor is from a town just inland from Mexico Beach, which took the hardest hit. He owns a home there and has family scattered throughout the area. He is also a trained medic and volunteer with a local fire department. Another church member is with EMA. We also have many others who have specialized training for just such a time as this.

The needs are specific. At first, the need was water, food, hand sanitizer, diapers, and such. Another day the need was chainsaws and files and chains. Those who go each day to deliver the supplies and work know exactly where they are going and what they will do that day.

As our senior pastor noted, there will be many opportunities in the coming months and years to volunteer in these areas. There won’t be a quick fix. We can’t just rush in and cut a few trees, pile up some debris and call it good. Everything is gone. There are many hurting people who will need help for a very long time. Remember: They have lost their homes, all of their possessions and, in most cases, their jobs.

The time will soon come when Hurricane Michael is just something that happened to someone else. We’ll all move on with our lives and focus on something else. But for the people who are suffering, well, the journey has only just begun. They’re going to need us all when the rest of the country has forgotten what they’ve been through and what they are still going through.

So, give and do what you can right now. Work with a reputable agency or group. If you volunteer, make sure you go through the appropriate groups, register and have a plan. Pray without ceasing for guidance as you help.

And remember that they will need you later too. One day the debris will be gone and the rebuilding will begin. They’ll need help. Homes must be built and furnished. Schools must be rebuilt and filled with desks and chairs and lockers and musical instruments and sports equipment. Something as simple as rebuilding a playground can do so much for morale.

It’s going to be a long journey. Will you be there for the long haul?

July 4, 2018

Freedom

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. – Galatians 5:1

What weighs you down today? What burdens are you carrying? What sin can’t you get past – either your own or someone else’s? What fear holds you back from God’s calling?

Christ came to set us free. But we have a choice. Do we give it all to Him and walk away from the yoke of slavery? Do we choose to live as free people?

We think of slavery as something horrible that happened back in the 1800s. It was. We think of being bound by drugs or drink or a job. But slavery? Really? In 2018? In the United States?

We consider ourselves to be free people. And, we are. Many have sacrificed their lives to allow us the freedom to bicker and point fingers. Many families have spent way too much time apart so that we could have the freedom to vote – even though most of us don’t. Do we ever consider the cost of our freedom?

Jesus Christ died a horrific death on a cross. He died for you and He died for me. Do you ever consider the cost of your freedom? Do you take it for granted? Can you even grasp the agony? Can you see the nails, the blood? Do you hear the mockers? Can you sense the fear in His followers?

Freedom comes with a cost, whether it is our freedom to live in this wonderful country or the freedom to choose Jesus, to choose forgiveness, to stand before God as blameless.

Jesus didn’t die so that we would remain slaves. He died so we could receive mercy, grace, forgiveness. So why do we wallow in it? Why do we cling to a past we can’t change? Why do we refuse to forgive ourselves and others? Why do we continue to live in bondage?

The world will tell us how we should live. It tells us what our purpose should be. It tells us what to value, what’s important, how to spend our day. The world doesn’t know Christ.

We are foreigners traveling to our forever home. We miss that point sometimes. We’re so busy living our “free” lives that we don’t realize we’re really slaves to a world that isn’t our home. We’ve become so protective of what we think is ours, that we forget we’re only caretakers of God’s possessions for a short time.

We are blessed this Fourth of July. We can watch fireworks and barbeque with friends. We can sleep late and go to the beach or mountains. We can live in relative certainty that we won’t wake up as captives in a foreign land. We are privileged. But are we grateful?

Never forget that we live in a free country because of the soldiers who protect us, fight for us, defend us and, sometimes, die for us. And never forget that Jesus Christ died and rose three days later to free our souls from death and eternal separation from God. On this day of celebration, take a moment to consider all that others have done for us and be grateful.

April 14, 2018

Bickering Destroys Us

If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other. – Galatians 5:15

A few years ago conversations turned heated in the contemporary worship committee meetings. The argument was always the same: Do we start a second service or continue with just one contemporary service each week.

Those in favor got ugly in their pursuit of being right. They offered up studies and statistics. They vowed to do whatever was necessary, to commit whatever hours were needed, to make it happen.

The other side argued that the church didn’t need a fourth service. The attendance in the one contemporary service didn’t justify adding a second one. We likely wouldn’t increase overall church attendance with the additional service. Oh, and one of the praise bands couldn’t be available at the second service.

The second service was added. Members of the second praise band continued for the first service until the criticism and putdowns got to be too much. They left the church, taking their gifts and talents with them.

Did we add members to the church? No. All we added was discord. Ironically, one of the most vocal proponents of the second service now desperately wants to see it end. He’s decided that the extra work, something he was so glad to do before it began, is just too much. But it’s a lot easier to add a service than to take one away.

One Sunday school class has been around for a long time. It began when its members were young professionals with small children. Now they are elderly retirees, with grandchildren and, in some cases, great grandchildren. They’ve earned the right to get their way on any and all issues. Just ask them.

The thermostat must be set according to their needs. It doesn’t matter that the class next door must literally use blankets in the summer because their classroom is so cold. They aren’t interested in a happy medium where everyone is satisfied. And they’re glad to hatefully tell anyone that.

The other day I was showing someone photos from a wonderful Easter play. She and her husband are new to town and I wanted to encourage her to attend our church. Two women quickly chimed in: At least we got to sing our song. The pastor didn’t want us to do it but we needed the time to get “Jesus” on the cross. It was just such a mess. I don’t know why the pastor was so difficult about it.

Seriously? That conversation should have stayed at the play rehearsal. No one needed to know about the disagreement. And certainly not someone looking for a church home. Is that who we are? Is that what we’ve become? Is it any wonder that people are staying away from churches? Who wants to be a part of that?

God turned that play into something that was powerful and moving, a live illustration of how Jesus suffered and what He did for us. It wasn’t about a song; it was about a Savior. How could they miss that?

We are so intent on getting our own way, on demanding that our voices be heard. All the outside world sees is the ugliness of destruction. We are destroying ourselves with our petty differences and need to be in control. Those who constantly grumble among themselves are destined to ultimately fail.

February 24, 2018

Help One Another

Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. – Galatians 6:2

I am blessed to find myself surrounded by a tribe of good and wonderful people. Most are not related by blood but they are the truest of true when it comes to being faithful.

Do you have your own tribe? Everyone needs people who will drop everything and come when they are needed. Everyone needs people who will love them no matter what. Everyone needs people who will speak truth and kindness into their lives. And everyone needs people who know when all we really need is a listening ear and an open heart.

Some people try to do life alone. It’s a hard journey.  We allow our pride or self-reliance to dictate our steps. Can you imagine the loneliness?

Others allow fear to hold them back. What if they are rejected for their failings? What if others condemn their insecurities, their past, their mistakes? It could happen. Maybe it has happened.

Building a tribe isn’t an easy road. That probably isn’t what you want to hear. Sometimes we make the mistake of trusting the wrong person. That doesn’t mean we should give up. We need each other.

How do we help each other? Sometimes it’s simply listening to the cries of a broken heart. Sometimes it is offering practical assistance with a task at hand. Other times it is by offering godly counsel.

We probably all know someone who thinks he’s got it together. He’s quick to tell you what to do. He’s determined to live your life right along with his own life. He would never make the mistakes you’ve made.

For if anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself. But let each one test his own work, and then his reason to boast will be in himself alone and not in his neighbor. For each will have to bear his own load. – Galatians 6:3-5

Don’t let anyone’s grandiose boasts make you think they’ve never made mistakes and never needed help. They have. Each of us is responsible for our own journey. Failing to understand that comes from pride and arrogance.

So does this notion that we must live up to the standards of other people. The thing about standards and expectations others hold up for us is that they are impossible for anyone, including the person looking down on us. Life is messy and wrought with traps that will trip us up. We need people who will help us, not weigh us down with their rules and regulations.

“They (the Pharisees) tie up heavy burdens, hard to bear, and lay them on people’s shoulders, but they themselves are not willing to move them with their finger.” – Matthew 23:4

We all go through different seasons of life. Some of those seasons are awesome and we feel a strength that can only come from God. Other seasons are filled with stress and worry, when we struggle to remember God’s promises over our lives. It is then when we most need someone to speak truth into our midst. We need to be reminded that we are not alone, we do have worth, this season will pass.

We who are strong have an obligation to bear with the failings of the weak, and not to please ourselves.

– Romans 15:1

I hope you have a group of supporters who love and cherish you. And I hope you are that for others. It is truly a blessing beyond words.

February 6, 2018

Do What's Inconvenient

Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. – Galatians 6:2

It was an ordinary outpatient procedure, albeit in a different hospital than the one we were accustomed to. After all that had happened, this was just so very minor.

We had found our way to the right place. We’d done the paperwork (There is always paperwork!) and waited our turn. We followed a nurse down a long hallway, my parents and I. Mother was readied for the procedure and there we sat. And sat. And sat.

My Dad was never one to miss a meal so he headed across the street to a fast food restaurant, promising to bring something back for me. We were still sitting there when he returned. Mother got more aggravated with each passing moment. We’d been in that shabby room for hours.

Finally! A nurse came to collect her. And another nurse informed my Dad and I that we would need to move to the appropriate waiting room, some distance away. I gathered up all our things: Mother’s purse and mine, another bag with snacks, medicine and paperwork, two jackets, her walking stick, yet another bag with her clothes and my Diet Coke. I looked over at my Dad. He carried his Diet Coke in one hand and tightly clutched a bag carrying a second burger in the other hand. Away we went.

This was quite normal in my world, me laden down with everyone’s things. I sure wish I’d had a camera ready, though, to take a photo of the volunteer’s face when we finally entered the correct waiting room. Her eyes opened wide and her mouth fell open as I entered, balancing everything so I could hold the door open for my Dad.

I just shrugged. She shook her head. Welcome to my world.

The other day I drove my cousin to see her daughter who was in a hospital ICU some distance away. People told me I was kind. What a good thing, someone said. It was my turn to shake my head. Of course, I’d driven her. I didn’t need praise for doing it. She wasn’t able to drive herself and she needed to go.

The real question for me was why no one else had offered to drive her. I wasn’t the only one who could have done so. I wasn’t the only relative or friend or church member. There were plenty who could have helped. They chose not to.

We’re always ready to do our part so long as it doesn’t inconvenience us. We’re happy to help by writing a check or doing something fun. But, honestly, there’s nothing fun about a long drive and a day in the hospital.

The Bible has numerous accounts of Jesus being inconvenienced by others. He didn’t seem to mind. He never pushed his obligations off on someone else. He never dismissed someone in need with the obligatory “I’ll pray for you.” Jesus did what He could where He was. How can we do anything less?

I’m not saying we should all do everything someone else asks us to do. I’m not suggesting that we should attempt to meet every need in this fallen world around us. But neither is it okay to stay in our insulated little world and let someone else always step up to do what we can but won’t.

We are to carry each other’s burdens. Anybody can be there for the celebratory meal or the grand event. Be there during the tough times. Make the sacrifices. Roll your sleeves up and work. That’s when your true faith emerges. That’s when your blessings abound.

February 1, 2018

End The Comparisons

Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone, without comparing themselves to someone else. – Galatians 6:4

Why do we always want what someone else has? Why are we never content to be the person God created us to be? Why are we needlessly comparing ourselves to others, finding either ourselves or the other person to be lacking?

Life is not a competition. God created each of us to be unique and to offer our gifts up to His service and for His glory. It doesn’t matter what someone else is or isn’t doing. That really isn’t what it’s all about.

This constant comparison drives a wedge where friendship should be. It shifts our focus from Jesus and on to things of the world. We were meant to build each other up not tear each other down.

We want to be thin like our co-worker. We want to throw awesome birthday parties like the mom down the street. We want to have a house as large as our sibling. We want to teach others about Jesus like the man who sits on the pew in front of us.

It doesn’t matter that our body shape is different from our co-worker. It doesn’t matter that the other mom loves to craft while our gift is more about gardening. What difference does a house size matter when you have to work 80 hours each week just to pay the mortgage? And praise the man called to teach. Maybe your gift is working with the nursery or the elderly.

That’s the thing. We all have different gifts. What if everyone had the gift of teaching adult Sunday school? Who would rock the babies in the nursery? Who would teach the children? Who would guide the youth? Who would help the elderly get safely to where they needed to be?

It’s no different in other areas of our lives. Some people are athletic and can run for miles. Others get more done through walking. Some people are born to lead and direct the multitudes. Others are happier and more productive being worker bees. One is not greater than the other. All are necessary.

What’s worse is that we allow all these comparisons to draw a wedge between people we should love and support. We’re so busy comparing our lives to theirs – either for the good or the bad – that we forget to be the cheerleaders. We forget to do our part. We forget that it’s not about them. And it’s not about us. It’s about Jesus. It’s always been about Jesus.

So don’t worry if the person next to you in gym can do more sit-ups than you can. And don’t worry that your co-worker got a promotion. Just focus on being the very best you possible. Walk humbly with God on the path He set before you. Focus your eyes on Jesus and do your part when God has placed you.

January 8, 2018

Whose Opinion Matters?

Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.

– Galatians 1:10

I am a people pleaser. I know. Some people will laugh at that. They only know a surface me who pretends not to care what other people think. Usually I give in to the wishes of others and I am less because of it.

Do you secretly care what people think? Are you hurt by the words of people who disagree? Do you feel guilty when you tell someone “no”? Do you question yourself when you disagree with the path someone else has chosen for you?

You’re a people pleaser too.

A friend wanted to stop by and handle a project for me. While I certainly appreciated it, I said no. Then I felt guilty. That guilt stayed with me for a while even though it was the right decision.

My reason for saying no? I didn’t want company. I didn’t want to get hot and sweaty and work on a Sunday afternoon. Again. Last Sunday I took the day off. It was my first true day off in years. Literally. And I liked it. The day rejuvenated me and gave me renewed energy that carried into the week.

The Bible tells us that God rested on the seventh day. The Sabbath. And yet our world is just so busy, we are just so busy, that we feel guilty actually taking time off. The world tells us we must work hard, continually, always striving to accomplish more. God tells us to rest.

A friend accompanied her husband on a trip. The resort was isolated. Cell reception was spotty at best. She loved it! It provided a great excuse not to work which translated into a much-needed vacation. All without the guilt.

So let’s get back to why some people laugh at the idea of my being a people pleaser. I do things other people don’t like. I teach truth other people would prefer not to hear. I do what needs to be done, whether others agree or not. I step on toes. People don’t forget that.

They don’t see the broken heart, the bruised feelings, the wounds that will never heal. I would prefer to never again encounter the drama that comes from telling someone no. I know it isn’t realistic. Drama exists. We disappoint people and they disappoint us. We fill our days with impossible expectations for ourselves and for others.

Sometimes the easiest way to diffuse all that is simply to take a day off. Rest and recharge your body and your mind. Trust that God knows what He is doing. 

May 11, 2016

Follow Your Dream

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. -- Galatians 5:1

What are you not doing because someone else doesn’t approve? I’m not talking about God. That’s approval you need. I’m talking about someone else in your life who is trying to impose their wishes on you.

I wonder how many opportunities we miss because someone else doesn’t want it for us. I wonder how many times we’ve failed to heed God’s call on our life because someone else thought we were being ridiculous.

The other day some friends and I were talking about prayer and the need to pray specifically for others. One man said he didn’t feel comfortable with that -- unless it was something like medical healing -- because he didn’t want to ask God for his will over someone else’s life.

I respect where he’s coming from but praying specifically for others isn’t about praying my will for them. It’s about asking specifically for God’s will in their life and for what they want.

An example: A sweet young woman has been trying for a year to be accepted as a student at the college of her choice. It is not my choice for her. She was accepted to my alma mater. I thought that’s where she should attend college. But her heart was somewhere else.

So I prayed for her. I prayed that God would grant her wish, not mine. I prayed for God’s will, of course, but I asked Him to let her dream come true. She got the acceptance letter she wanted so badly. She’s following her dream. I am happy for her.

We all have dreams. We imagine what our lives will be like. Sometimes life takes a detour and that’s okay. Well, maybe usually life takes a detour. But there are detours caused by something better or circumstances beyond our control -- such as an illness -- and there are detours caused by listening to others belittle our dreams.

A distant cousin has been a songwriter for much of his life. He is just now seeing some success. How long has he been following his dream? Twenty years? Probably longer. I have heard negative comments but never from his family. They have supported him unconditionally, have cheered him on, and done all they could to promote him. He is blessed to have them. Not everyone is so fortunate.

Here’s the thing: When God calls you to something, see it through. Don’t let anyone else’s opinion cause you to detour. That dream He placed in your heart is more valuable than gold because it came from God Almighty. Don’t let Him down.

March 29, 2016

Please God Or People?

Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ. -- Galatians 1:10

Who are you trying to please? Are you trying to please your spouse? Your children? Your boss? Your friends?

Who should you please? God.

Is it easy? No. Most of us prefer to not have all that drama that comes when people are unhappy with us. It’s just easier to go along than to stand our ground. Sometimes that can be a good thing. Except when your actions aren’t pleasing to God.

Have you ever used your spouse as an excuse to not go to church? Have you ever used your spouse as an excuse to not take your children to church? Obviously, church attendance doesn’t turn someone into a Christian. But being surrounded by people who love Jesus does impact on our lives. It helps us learn and allows us to worship with others.

When you let your spouse keep you from church, what are you saying to God? Are you telling God that your spouse, and your spouse’s opinion are more important than God?

Have you ever been embarrassed to pray before a meal at a restaurant? Why? Are you grateful to God for providing you with food? Then why are you hiding that gratitude? If you’re with people who aren’t believers, it’s still okay to pray silently. I’ve done it many times. If someone scoffs, that’s on them. You answer to God.

We also answer to God when it comes to where you go and what you do. Have you ever been invited to a club or a movie or a party or anything that you know deep inside is the wrong place to be? That’s the Holy Spirit speaking to you. Do you heed His voice? Or do you silently participate because it’s easier than the comments and laughter that might come if you bow out?

Each and every day we have choices to make. Some seem smaller than others but when we allow ourselves to start a slide, that slide has a way of escalating into something we never intended.

Paul said it to eloquently. If we’re trying to please people, we really can’t be servants of God. The choice is yours.

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Your Calling Begins With One Step

But when God, who set me apart from birth and called me by his grace, was pleased to reveal his Son in me so that I might preach him among the Gentiles, I did not consult any man, not did I go up to Jerusalem to see those who were apostles before I was, but I went immediately into Arabia and later returned to Damascus. -- Galatians 1:15-17

Whenever we feel called to do something, we seem to need a committee to help us decide if we should do it or not. We’ve got to weigh the pros and cons. We’ve got to analyze it to death.

Sometimes caution is good. Other times caution is just an excuse to keep from stepping out in faith and following God where He would have you go.

Most Christians will tell you that they want to do God’s will but they simply don’t know what it is. Maybe that’s so. It’s difficult at times to drown out our own wishes and the comments from those around us to really hear what God has to say. But we can do it by spending time in His Word, in prayer, and in solitude.

And let me make something clear: You’ll never hear God if you don’t learn to be quiet. While God sometimes comes in flashes of light, most often His voice is the whisper we hear down deep in our souls.

Another way to determine God’s will is to follow your own passions. What excites you? What gets you all riled up at injustice? What breaks your heart? Those emotions are some wonderful indicators of how God made you.

That said, don’t expect your calling to be easy or always fun. Expect hardships. Expect ridicule. Expect to work harder than you ever have. And expect a satisfaction like you’ve never known before.

Also ask yourself a key question: Why do I feel compelled to do this thing? Is it something you simply have to do, regardless of the cost or whether anyone ever notices? Or is it something that will bring you glory, maybe a pay raise and a lifestyle change? Because if it’s a calling from God, you won’t care about anything else. If it’s external stuff, well, that never comes from God and will never satisfy your soul.

It is okay to sometimes ask for advice, just be really careful. Everyone has an agenda, whether they realize it or acknowledge it or not. It can’t be about them and what they want. Your calling is uniquely your own

Also, the person(s) giving advice shouldn’t tell you what to do but should lead you to discover your own motivations and desires and how those line up with God’s will. Remember: A calling from God is never about you.

Paul didn’t wait for permission to begin his ministry. He didn’t hesitate. He simply took first one step and then another in faith. So should you.

Monday, October 1, 2012

Hypocrites Are Everywhere

Peter came to Antioch, I opposed him to his face, because he was clearly in the wrong. Before certain men came from James, he used to eat with the Gentiles. But when they arrived, he began to draw back and separate himself from the Gentiles because he was afraid of those who belonged to the circumcision group. The other Jews joined him in his hypocrisy, so that by their hypocrisy even Barnabas was led astray.

-- Galatians 2:11-13

A few years ago I attended a local event to hear a woman share her testimony and give a talk about following God. She seemed so sweet, so mellow, so nice. Unfortunately, those qualities rarely translate into a good speaker. I felt guilty as I counted the minutes until a break so I could slip out.

Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on your view, I heard her explain how she’d come to be the speaker for that particular organization. She said they’d called her on a Friday afternoon and asked her to pray about it. Of course, she explained, she couldn’t do anything else all weekend and by Monday she simply had to say yes.

Fast forward to Friday afternoon. The telephone rang and it was one of the ladies from the group. They wanted me to take over as publicity chairperson. I didn’t need to answer right away. Just take the weekend and pray about, she told me. Sound familiar? It did to me too. I was not amused.

That said, I did think about it and pray about it. I might even have gone along with it had I not attended that awful event. I was just so thankful that I hadn’t encouraged a friend to attend with me. My friend desperately needed Jesus and she wasn’t going to find her at that venue. I couldn’t imagine myself trying to publicize events with people I’d never met or heard.

I simply didn’t feel called to do this. God has called me to do a number of things, most of which I’m trying to do. (There is that one thing that still scares me half to death but I’m working on it.) Publicity for this group wasn’t one of them.

I was nice. I simply told the woman that I didn’t feel God calling me to the post but I was certain she would find someone wonderful. She was not pleased but she did attempt to hide it. We chatted briefly and said we’d see each other at the next monthly luncheon. And we did.

Except my reception was less than welcome. This woman refused to look me in the eye, let alone speak to me. The other board members were barely cordial. Needless to say, I never returned.

They are a gathering of Christian women of different faiths. They welcomed me with open arms -- until I didn’t go along with their plans for me. And while I’m sure they will forever think less of me for that, I forgave them their attitudes long ago. That said, I’ve never again encouraged anyone to participate in their group. Hypocrisy abounds. Even in the midst of Christian fellowship.