July 10, 2023

 

Stop Gossiping

 

Those who consider themselves religious and yet do not keep a tight rein on their tongues deceive themselves, and their religion is worthless. – James 1:26

 

She started her Facebook post with the words “I heard.” That was the telltale sign. She wasn’t passing on factual information. She was passing on something that may or may not be true. Her justification? It might be against her religious beliefs.

 

I could only shake my head and remove the post from my news feed. It’s not the first time this “devout” Christian has passed on something like this. She’s a huge gossip who never bothers to check her “facts” before posting something.

 

You will never convince her that this is wrong. I’ve tried. If pushed, she just explains that it’s her opinion. That she’s harming people, sometimes people she doesn’t even know, doesn’t faze her a bit. Her “values” are tied up falsehoods. And she wonders why so many people are turning from God.

 

We Christians don’t live by the same standards we require of others. Yes. We all sin and fall short of the glory of God. I’m really not talking about that. It’s more a lofty, condescending attitude that we know better than anyone else.  How sad.

 

Whoever conceals hatred with lying lips and spreads slander is a fool.

– Proverbs 10:18

 

She claims to love everyone. She tosses the words around like they are a given. And then she puffs up to proclaim judgement. It’s that hypocrisy nonbelievers keep talking about. Her talk of love belies her quick condemnation of anyone who disagrees with her views. Her knowledge of the Bible is skewed as she uses its words as weapons to slaughter rather than words to heal.

 

Maybe I am no different. How many times have I used words to harm rather than heal? Haven’t we all done so? As Christians, we are called to bring others toward Jesus with the light we shine into this dark world. That begins with paying attention to our words. Stop gossiping and start feeding people hope.

December 20, 2018

Lies Disguised as Truth

“You have profaned me among my people for a few handfuls of barley and scraps of bread. By lying to my people, who listen to lies, you have killed those who should not have died and have spared those who should not live.” – Ezekiel 13:19

It’s all just a masquerade but so many people think it’s real. They get agitated and upset over something they believe, causing them to sin in ways they wouldn’t otherwise have sinned.

We gather together with hearts hardened toward others, righteous in our beliefs and unwilling to listen to the other viewpoint. We don’t bother to check our facts or review our sources, choosing to believe what sounds good over what is right.

During my first semester of college, we were required to take a course titled Mass Communications 101. This was long before tabloids joined the broadcast ranks and long before the internet was slammed with Facebook and YouTube and other venues. It was a time of clear lines between legitimate news journalists and those who shredded the truth in order to sensationalize a story.

We studied the ways in which tabloids would take a tiny fact and surround it with what ifs and possibilities and unnamed sources. A person who wasn’t careful could believe aliens had invaded Los Angeles or a celebrity was having an affair. No proof was required.

We the people enjoyed that. We fed on what was sordid. We snatched up the tabloids and clamored for more. It was juicy reading and we believed it all.

Every now and then someone would sue but mostly folks just let it go. It’s difficult to prove someone tried to harm you even though you could easily argue that lies are intended to harm.

We the people fueled it all with our insatiable appetite for those things that fueled our anger and inspired our passions. We hungered for reality shows that made us feel better about ourselves by exposing the sordid lives of others. Our soap operas of yesterday became the tabloid journalism of today.

I am amazed at those who truly believe if it’s on YouTube or Facebook that it has to be true. I can only shake my head at those who truly believe that “news” on television is created all the same. They can’t see that people arguing about an issue has nothing to do with “news” and everything to do with opinion.

This isn’t about political positions. It’s about facts. Just because one person said it doesn’t make it true. Do people research issues and check facts? No. It’s just too easy to focus on those who share our opinions and spread their views as facts.

We have created a monster. Or, maybe, Satan has created a monster and used us to do it. We seek to destroy each other, unable to share a civil conversation about any issues we disagree on. We are so busy fighting “for” God, that we’ve lost Him and we don’t even know it.

Satan works hard each day to lead us astray, to focus our fight on each. Every time we believe his lies, we become less of who we could be in Christ.

December 13, 2018

Bad Behavior

But when John rebuked Herod the tetrarch because of his marriage to Herodias, his brother’s wife, and all the other evil things he had done, Herod added this to them all: He locked John up in prison.

– Luke 3:19-20

We don’t want anyone to point out our sin to us. We get defensive. We blame them. We’re good at pointing fingers but don’t you dare say anything about our own behavior.

That extends to others. This political climate we’re in amazes and distresses me. A common defense is we can’t hold one person accountable for their sins because of the sins of another person. What’s that old cliché? Two wrongs don’t make a right. Someone else’s wrong behavior doesn’t justify your behavior or the behavior of someone you support in the political arena.

How many times have we heard a child explain their behavior with “everyone” was doing it? It’s as though going along with the crowd makes wrong behavior okay. That excuse isn’t limited to kids. Adults do it too.

Think about the excuses you or others offer up: Everyone was drinking; Everyone was padding their expense accounts; everyone was making derogatory comments; everyone was doing whatever they wanted.

Herod was no exception. He was in charge. How dare John the Baptist – or anyone – question whatever he wanted to do? He wanted his brother’s wife. It didn’t matter what John said. It didn’t matter what God said. It didn’t matter what anyone thought or said. It was all about what Herod wanted.

John the Baptist was brave enough to call him out on it. John refused to remain silent even though it cost him his life

Do you remain silent when you see wrong doing? We don’t want to get involved. We judge. It’s not that. We just don’t want to suffer for it. We’d rather voice our opinions, our judgments, behind someone’s back or as a political rant, than to actually go face-to-face with someone.

We don’t want to be criticized or condemned for offering up our “opinions.” A few months ago a friend once again shared and commented on ugly political views. There’s no truth to the allegations she shares but she believes it. That’s her choice. But someone else called her out on it. They were nice but they asked why her comments were so hateful and mean. They wanted to know why she thought it was okay.

She offered up the standard opinion response. I admired the woman who challenged her. She is braver than I. Or maybe I know this woman well enough to know that only Jesus can change her heart. She is a wonderful Christian woman, with a good heart, who prays and tries to live as Jesus lived. Until it comes to politics.

But here’s something else I noticed: After the exchange, she stopped sharing so much ugliness. Oh, every now and then, she’ll share something hateful but mostly she doesn’t anymore. I hope it’s because the Holy Spirit convicted her.

It’s not about opinions. Everyone has a right to their own opinions. It’s about passing on untruths that are mean and bigoted and justifying bad behavior as your opinion. It’s like Herod believing because he was the ruler, he could do what he knew was wrong.

When someone starts pointing the finger at someone else, pause before you chime in. It could just be that the one full of condemnation is only trying to cover up their own sins.

November 26, 2018

Spreading Lies

“Do not spread false reports. Do not help a guilty person by being a malicious witness.

“Do not follow the crowd in doing wrong. When you give testimony in a lawsuit, do not pervert justice by siding with the crowd,” – Exodus 23:1-2

A wicked person listens to deceitful lips; a liar pays attention to a destructive tongue. – Proverbs 17:4

It was one of those outrageous lies. You know what I’m talking about. Someone says something on Facebook and everyone starts sharing it without bothering to check the “facts.”

California is not trying to ban the Bible. The state legislature couldn’t even if it wanted to. The First Amendment still exists. Nor is the state attempting to shut down faith-based bookstores.

A legislator trying to stir up support for his campaign spread falsehoods about a proposed piece of legislation. It was something easily checked. But, well, the lie sounded right to people who want to think only the devil and his followers live in California.

What bothers me is our willingness to share lies like it’s nothing. It matters. When you seek to harm people by stirring up hatred and discord, you become part of the problem. You become a liar too.

I lived in California. I attended one of many churches in California. I know. It’s shocking to some of you. California is the home of many Christians. There are many, many homes filled with people who pray and study the Bible and try to live according to God’s Word.

Many of the people who spread Facebook lies consider themselves to be honest, Christian people. They would argue vehemently, defending themselves and saying they believed the lie. They didn’t bother to check the “facts” but, well, they’re entitled to their opinion. It’s just too easy to hit that share button. But when you repeat lies – gossip at its worst – you are a liar.

I know. Some people point the finger at Facebook and certainly that company must share the blame. But we each have individual responsibility to make sure that what we share is factual, not because it sounds right but because we’ve checked the facts.

Stop spreading lies, and hate, on Facebook and other social media outlets. It not only makes you look bad, it turns people away from Jesus.

October 11, 2018

Love Your Neighbor

But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?”

– Luke 10:29

“The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” – Mark 12:31

It’s the day after. Hurricane Michael destroyed so much yesterday. Even now, it’s wreaking havoc on other areas. For those where I am, well, today we begin to pick up the pieces.

There are trees to cut up and remove, roofs to tarp until roofers can get to them. Some will be replacing windows and vehicles. Others, hurricane refuges, will grieve for all they have lost.

Facebook has proven to be a good outlet for locating family members, friends, work associates. Storm devastation prevents all but first responders from entering many areas and, with cell service not available, all many can do is pray and wait. Strangers helping strangers. One person posted a photo of a daughter, her husband and their two children so that a frantic mother could know they are fine.

The Coffee County Baptist Association Relief Group headed out this morning. Other religious and civic groups did the same. There are people to be fed, to be helped, to be held through their tears. Strangers helping strangers yet again.

My community was hit by a devastating tornado 11 years ago. It destroyed the high school. Eight students died. People came from all around to help. We remember that and we pay it forward every time something awful happens in another community.

The unfortunate truth is that people are kinder, friendlier, more apt to help strangers, when something awful has happened. Devastating storms bring out the best in us. It’s like we suddenly remember that we’re neighbors, no matter how far apart we live. We remember that Jesus told us to love people, to help others, to do good.

So, we fan out in droves. We pray without ceasing. We donate water and canned food. We hand out pillows and blankets. We pull on work gloves and offer generators. We share what we have because we know it could easily have been us. We love people where they are and forget to notice differences.

I wish we could be like that all the time. I wish we would help the elderly without being asked. I wish we would share and speak kindly. I wish we would focus on what we have in common and look over our differences.

Maybe that’s the lesson God is trying to teach us. Love your neighbors, whether you know them or not. Love your neighbors, whether you live close or far away. Love your neighbors. This world is hurting so badly. Just be Jesus. That’s all. Just be Jesus.

September 29, 2018

What Do Your Words Reveal?

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. – Ephesians 4:29

One of the most interesting things about all the political talk is watching people justify their words and their opinions. It would be comical if it wasn’t so sad.

One woman, someone who sees herself as a fine Christian, was taken aback by a friend who responded to yet another hateful post on Facebook. The friend said something I’ve thought many times: She called the post hateful and mean and questioned this woman for writing it.

Naturally, it produced a defensive response. It’s “my opinion,” she insisted. “I have the right to express my opinion.” “It’s not hateful. I don’t use curse words.” “I’ve got a lot at stake in this debate.” And, here’s the clincher, “Christians have been silent too long.”

It took a great deal of self-control to keep from responding to that. Jesus has no part in this hatred that has spread over our land. He’s just the excuse some folks use for speaking from their own self-interests.

Let’s try something here. “He’s so stupid! Did you hear what he said? He’s nothing but a liar and a thief. Those people should be prosecuted. How dare they condemn a good man! I know he’s good. I don’t need to meet him. He’s good and those others are just awful people. I heard they stole money. Did you hear that? I know it’s true. I can tell. Can’t you? Yes! They need to go to jail. How dare they say something bad about such a good person when they’ve done so much evil!”

If you read or heard those words would you think the person was being hateful or mean? There are no curse words in there. A little gossip. A lot of commentary about something the writer would know nothing about. Slander. Lots of opinions. Words that are designed to fuel anger and spread hurt.

I made that up. You know that. But I could have copied and pasted those words from any number of Facebook posts from this woman or dozens more. Sure, they’re entitled to their “opinions.” I’ve big on the First Amendment and our right to free speech. What makes me angry is justifying this ugliness by claiming to defend Jesus.

“A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.” – Luke 6:45

This is what Jesus said about evil words. Jesus isn’t in this ugliness. Unfortunately, those who don’t know Him, don’t know that God is love, turn away from the One who loves them most because of these lies.

What’s also unfortunate is what the ugly words reveal about the person saying them. The woman who got called out for her ugliness is someone I’ve known a long time. I always considered her to be a strong woman of faith, someone who is a prayer warrior. I’m starting to question that. I don’t know how someone who truly has the love of Jesus inside of them can be so consistently ugly with their words and opinions.

It’s makes me consider her heart. It makes me remember the ugly comments I’ve heard her make about the poor or about immigration. I’d excused those remarks. I’d given her a pass because she’s led such a sheltered life, without ever having to support herself or do without anything. I’d extended grace, the same grace she refuses to extend to anyone who disagrees with her opinions.

Jesus said our words reflect our hearts. What do your words reveal about you?

February 19, 2018

Trust God

The one who conceals hatred has lying lips, and whoever utters slander is a fool. – Proverbs 10:18

He is a friend, a relative, a co-worker. She is a neighbor, a fellow parent or church member. You think you all get along. While you aren’t super close, the relationship in your eyes is friendly and warm.

Then you find out – quite by accident – that you’ve been unfriended on Facebook. You ask a few subtle questions of mutual friends. Nothing. Do you start a conversation with this person? Do you just let it go?

It stings. There’s no way around it.

Then there’s the person who spends his days bashing you. Never to your face, of course. He’s so sweet and kind. You almost believe his lies. Except for the people who ask if you know what he’s saying behind your back. It happens once, twice, numerous times.

You could confront him. What’s the point? He is following a pattern of behavior he’s engaged in throughout his life. You’ve heard him bash others the same way he is now bashing you.

What bothers you the most about it all is the hypocrisy of it. That’s especially true when the offender is a fellow church member or someone who loudly proclaims his faith to the world. You wonder if anyone else sees the trouble with someone who is nice to your face and yet slams you behind your back.

One man is such a public Christian. He can quote the Bible verse after verse. He offers up the most beautiful prayers, being sure to lay hands on people and proclaim their healing. He is quick to teach, to save souls, to proclaim all God has done for him.

His life behind this persona is totally different. Those who have known him long and well just shake their heads. They hear the lies and have for as long as they have known him. They don’t miss how he takes credit for things only Jesus can do. As one relative said, “The devil quotes the Bible too.”

He is a snake, waiting in the grass to attack his unsuspecting victims. His mouth runs wild with venom, lies designed to destroy. All in God’s name of course. And all behind the back of those he claims to care about.

It’s never easy to feel the sting of rejection and betrayal. Understand that it’s not about you. And know that it doesn’t come from God. You can face the situation and try to resolve it or you can simply let it go. Forgive and move on, being ever watchful for the next attack.

People who think it’s okay to slander people behind their backs are fools not worth knowing. Don’t stoop to their level. Don’t retaliate. God is the defender of His children. Keep your own counsel, venting only to God. Trust that He will handle it because He will.

January 29, 2018

Measure Your Words With Care

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. – Ephesians 4:29

I live in a football crazy state. Friends joke that the first question they were asked when they moved here was “Which church do you belong to?” The second was “Which team do you cheer for?”

There is at times a bitter divide, causing some to get carried away with their allegiance. The hatred can seem so real at times.

One friend, a dear man whom I’ve known for years, supports “his” team with a vengeance. I have grown increasingly appalled at the comments he makes about the opposing team. It’s not enough to support “his” team. He must constantly bash the other team and speak awful things about that team’s supporters.

And when he is done, he turns around and posts things like “God is good!” Excuse me? I’m sure he has no idea how he trashes his own witness for Jesus by the hatred he shares in other posts.

Isn’t that the case for all of us? We’ve become so accustomed to simply saying whatever we think or feel in the moment. Facebook provides a wonderful outlet for bashing without any of the face-to-face consequences we might get if we spoke those words in an actual conversation.

It’s my opinion you might be saying right now. Absolutely. You have the right to express your opinion in any nonviolent way you choose. But it’s important to realize that your words have consequences, whether you feel them or not.

The same is true of the political comments made by so many. I have come so close to unfriending people because of their nastiness. I don’t care if someone disagrees with my views. So what? It’s the ugliness and hatred that bothers me, especially when that person is also claiming to follow Jesus.

Jesus talked so much about love. Why do we so easily forget that? Why don’t we care that words can never be recovered, never be erased, never be forgotten?

I’ve tried to measure my Facebook words with care. I share scripture and biblical commentary. And I share a great many lost and found dog posts. What I intentionally try not to share is hatred. Don’t we have enough of that in our world?

I know some of my friends would claim to be promoting God’s agenda. They view themselves as followers standing up to those who would oppose “our” values. Except “our” values rarely line up with the Bible. Why are we so blind to that?

We have become a know-it-all people who rarely seek God’s wisdom. We pray for His blessings on our own agendas. We spew hatred in His name, rather than loving people and promoting what is good and right.

The next time you decide to share something, whether it’s your own words or another post, think about how it will be received by nonbelievers or those struggling with their faith. Does it build people up? Will it benefit God’s kingdom? Are the words spoken in love? If the answer is no, then don’t post it.

When in doubt, remember this: “Be careful how you live. You may be the only Bible some person ever reads.” Well said, William J. Toms. Well said.

April 15, 2016

Prayers Are Powerful

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. -- James 5:16

How much time to you spend praying for other people? Really? Are you sure? We intend to pray for others quite a bit but do we really take time to actually pray for them?

“I’ll pray for you.” We throw those words out quite casually. Do we mean it? Probably at the time we do. Then we forget.

Prayer requests pop up on Facebook quite a bit. I’ve made a habit of actually praying for someone before I comment that I am praying. That way I know I’ve done as I said I would. Many of the people, I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. God knows them.

It allows us to participate in something pretty awesome. A prayer community. A support group, of sorts.

A sweet woman is facing a devastating divorce. I know her mostly through Facebook and other friends. She deserves so much better than a soon-to-be-ex who is determined to hurt her with his words and actions.

We’ve surrounded her with prayer and love and support. I hope she feels it. She says that she does. I can’t get her off my mind and the prayers have come all day. Her faith will see her through. I know that. And I know that prayer will empower her all the more.

There’s a baby who was transferred recently to another part of the country. He is fighting for his life. His parents? How can anyone endure the weeks of waiting and watching, of praying and begging God to intervene and heal their son?

Prayers are strong for this little warrior. I know that God has sent His angels to watch over him. I don’t understand the why of it all. I’m not meant to. But I do know my part: to pray continually for a miracle that will heal this baby.

The list goes on and on. A man who found out two days ago that he has cancer. A woman struggling to support herself and her child. A family torn apart by lies and deceit. How could we possibly include them all? How can we not?

I don’t have a lot of answers to that. I do know that during tough times in my life, the prayers of others carried me. God hears our prayers, our petitions, as we cry out for Him to help others -- whether we know them personally or not.

So take time to pray as you can. Remember those who are hurting, who are sick, who are alone. Don’t just say you’ll pray, do it. Prayer matters.