February 7, 2023

 

Financial Gain

 

If anyone teaches otherwise and does not agree to the sound instruction of our Lord Jesus Christ and to godly teaching, they are conceited and understand nothing. They have an unhealthy interest in controversies and quarrels about words that result in envy, strife, malicious talk, evil suspicions and constant friction between people of corrupt mind, who have been robbed of the truth and who think that godliness is a means to financial gain.

– 1 Timothy 6:3-5

 

Paul didn’t use soft words. He’d just written about slaves having respect for their owners and then he went right on to false teachers, unrest and money. God surely shows us exactly what we need and when.

 

I’ve written about our divided local church and the path toward a vote on disaffiliating from the United Methodist Church. There are those who insist it’s over “traditional values” but the hard truth is that it’s all about money. And power. Oh, and control. It’s coming from people who think it’s okay to write a check, tell everyone else how to run the church, and then most of the time don’t bother to even show up. And it’s about judgmental people who point fingers without bothering to exam themselves.

 

At times I beat myself up for my own judgmental attitude. I struggle with anger at the pointlessness of it all. Where is Jesus in all this? Why do people think it’s okay to blame others for all the church’s flaws when they don’t bother to show up?

 

Money. Money. Money. There unfortunately are people who truly believe that money should give them the right to “own” church property. There are those who truly believe that money should give them the right to control all the decisions in the church, whether it’s hiring, Bible studies or various ministries.

 

I am a thorn that keeps drawing blood. Jesus’ blood. Because I believe that the church and all its properties belong to God. I believe that Jesus Himself should dictate hiring and Bible studies and all ministries.

 

I could provide my “credentials” if you will. I could talk about family history and ministry activities and volunteer hours. But why? I do what God calls me to do. I have nothing to brag about other than what Jesus has done for me.

 

We are stewards of what God has placed in our care, whether people or things. There are those who would destroy what is His because of their own greed and lust for power. It’s nothing more than a business deal to them.

 

I have no idea how it will all turn out. Satan seems determined to destroy what God has built. His minions are hard at work, spreading lies and constantly causing unrest. Deep inside, a peace fills me. This battle belongs to God.

February 4, 2022

 

Quiet Time

 

But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.

– Luke 5:16

 

How often do you pray? I’m not asking how often you talk about praying. I’m not counting those one sentence prayers you throw out in desperation or to make a point. I’m asking how often you actually sit or kneel down in a quiet place and spend time with God, talking and listening.

 

We take prayer for granted, don’t we? God is always there so when we really need Him, we pray. Desperation turns a soul toward the One who can make it all right again. We cry out in anguish, in anger, in grief.

 

But what about all those other times. Do we thank God when life is good? Do we spend time with Him when we are filled with blessings? Or do we take it all for granted?

 

Are you tired from the demands of your life? Are you so busy juggling responsibilities that you just can’t seem to find time for God? He understands, you tell yourself. If you bother to think of Him at all, that is.

 

What would happen if you began each day with God? How would your day look if you asked Him to direct your path? How would it feel if God took care of you and everything on your list of responsibilities?

 

God provides us with the power to handle our day. It might not end up looking like the day we imagined. Maybe that’s our issue with kneeling before God. We want to be in control but He demands that we relinquish that control to Him. Funny thing about all that. We aren’t ever really in control. It’s an illusion that makes us feel safe for a time.

 

God is in control. He knows what’s coming. He knows what we need and how best to protect and nurture us. God loves us beyond anything we could imagine. No matter what. There is security in that.

 

So give it a try. Start your day with God. Talk to Him and take time to listen to what He has to say. You may just find yourself craving Him in a way you never imagined. You may even begin looking forward to that quiet time you spend alone with Him.

January 21, 2022

                               Surrender

 

Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose trust is the LORD. – Jeremiah 17:7

 

Worries abound. Health issues. Financial issues. Relationship issues. It’s like there is always something that threatens to steal our peace and drive us to the brink of anxiety.

 

We live in an uncertain world. Just when we think Covid is about to end, another variant emerges and here we go again. Have you lost someone you cared about to Covid? I have. Many times over. Age doesn’t seem to matter. Covid doesn’t just hit the old and ill. It takes the young and healthy.

 

Prices on everything are skyrocketing. Food and gasoline and everything else are much higher now. But paychecks haven’t increased to cover those extra costs. Jobs are everywhere. Despite ugly comments about people too lazy to work and government handouts, unemployment is low. There simply aren’t enough people to fill vacancies, especially when those vacancies are for low pay.

 

Relationships are stressed by all the demands of this new life we didn’t want. Kids are in school one day and virtual the next. Parents are juggling jobs and schoolwork and childcare. Older folks are isolated from their peers and, in some cases, their families. We are all struggling in what appears to be an unending path to destruction.

 

How do we survive? God. We’re trying to manage things we were never meant to manage. We’re trying to control things we can’t control. We are allowing life to bring us to the breaking point without realizing God is the only One who is steadfast and true. He is the only anchor in this thing we call life.

 

What would happen if you simply surrendered it all to God? What would it feel like to hand it all over to the One who loves you most, the One who knows the answers, the One who can protect you from all harm?

 

We don’t have to do life on our own. We really don’t have to know all the answers. We can simply trust God and KNOW that He is in control and that we can find rest in the shelter of His arms

November 19, 2018

Bring God Glory

We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us.

– Romans 12:6a

Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. – 1 Peter 4:10

She wanted to know exactly what we would be doing at the craft event. One craft had already been announced but she wanted to know what the other one was. I didn’t know. She was surprised by that.

I directed her to the sweet woman who heads up this event for the Women’s Ministry Team. I may lead the team but I don’t micromanage or try to control what other team members are doing. I trust them. I know their talents and abilities. And they know if there is anything I can do to help, promote or support their efforts, I will gladly do it.

I realize that’s a different approach for some people. They want to be involved and consulted at every stage of an event. They want to be in control even if they aren’t in charge. I’m not one of them.

Maybe it’s because I spent years supervising more than 100 employees located in different geographical areas. I depended on managers and their assistants to do their jobs. If they didn’t, I found someone who would. At a certain point you have to realize and accept that you can’t do it all yourself.

Or maybe it’s because in my season of caregiving I learned how little control I have over anything. My plans could, and often were, disrupted on a daily basis by the needs of parents, livestock or other things. I learned a great deal about trusting God in the midst of continuing storms. I learned a great deal about the ugliness that happens when others want to control without actually showing up to help.

So, I don’t need to control everyone or everything around me. It’s a lesson God taught me. It’s a lesson I hope never to have to relearn.

We are all gifted in different ways, with different talents and abilities. The sweet woman who heads up the craft events is gifted at finding wonderful crafts that are easy to make and that everyone will enjoy. Another sweet woman is gifted in producing snacks that everyone loves and raves about. I am merely the worker who helps where I can, whether it’s plugging in glue guns or arranging snacks.

I have my own gifts, my own abilities. We all do. God meant for us to work together, each gift and skill complimenting those of others, to produce good works for His people. God surely wanted us to get along, to trust each other, and to let others use their talents.

I’m not really sure why some people need to control everything and everyone. I don’t know why they’re never satisfied with their own gifts and talents. I don’t understand why they need to do their part and direct the parts of everyone else. That’s not how God organized us all.

We can do so much good by simply getting out of each other’s way and letting others shine with their gifts. We can work together as a team and produce great things for God’s glory. Every one of us is gifted in some way. Use your gifts to let God’s light shine brightly.

October 9, 2018

What Are You Trying to Control?

“Do you think I came to bring peace on earth? No, I tell you, but division.”

– Luke 12:51

“I have control issues,” she said. I bit back the ugly retort that came immediately to my mind. I’m fairly certain that everyone who knows her knows that she has control issues.

It’s actually sad. She and another friend have dominating personalities that push people away. No one wants to deal with them because they refuse to listen to anyone else’s suggestions or ideas. If you don’t agree with them, they get ugly.

I refuse to be bullied. I mostly just walk away from ugliness these days. It makes me sick inside. I’ve got too much to do to deal with it. The one area I do stand firm: When God has called me to something and they are determined to derail it.

It’s this kind of ugliness within the Christian community that turns so many people away. I don’t blame them. If you don’t know Jesus personally, there’s no way to withstand the onslaught of such selfishness.

We’ve all got our own agendas. We do. So, don’t try to make yourself out to be someone else. The key when you are a person of faith is to open your heart to what He’s got to say. The challenge is to stand firm when someone who claims to know Him decides they want to be in control of something God has told you to do.

I know their hearts are good. I know that. But here’s the thing: if you find the need to tell someone you have control issues, you need to back away and ask God to help you deal with those issues. Don’t keep pushing ahead trying to control what is not yours to control.

Let’s take this a step further. Bullying is a big issue these days. We typically think of that as an issue with kids and teens. Where do you think they learn that bullying is acceptable behavior? From the adults in their lives.

God is in control. Period. We aren’t. One thing I learned in recent years is that I have no control over anything. I used to imagine I was in control. God certainly taught me otherwise.

The question, then, is why we so desperately need to control not just our lives but the lives of others. It’s only an illusion but we grasp at it with an intensity that drives people away. Sadly, it also drives people away from Jesus.

Life is not about us. It isn’t. It isn’t about what I want or what you want. It’s about what He wants. God knows best. That’s another lesson I’ve learned. No matter what I think I want, what I think is best, I really don’t know the best thing. So many times, I’ve thanked God for protecting me from what I thought I had to have.

My friend is a go-getter who is super organized and works hard at whatever task she’s takes on. I hope one day she’ll learn to loosen her grip on those tasks and open her heart to hear the voices and opinions of others. She’ll be happier and so will everyone else.

September 8, 2018

Who Gets Hurt?

You are still worldly. For since there is jealousy and quarreling among you, are you not worldly? Are you not acting like mere humans? For when one says, “I follow Paul,” and another, “I follow Apollos,” are you not mere human beings? What, after all, is Apollos? And what is Paul? Only servants, through whom you came to believe – as the Lord has assigned to each his task. I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God has been making it grow.

– 1 Corinthians 3:3-6

People like to squabble, don’t we? We don’t care if it’s college football, political ideology or the type of music played during worship services. We’ll have an argument, not because we particularly care about the issue, but because we’re determined to be right.

Being in control makes us feel confident. Our opinions are always right. We don’t want to compromise. We don’t want to share the glory. It’s all about us anyway.

Oops. No. It’s not all about us. It’s not about us at all. It’s not about you. It’s not about me. It’s about giving glory to God. We lose sight of that when we’re pushing ahead to get our own way.

One thing that I have witnessed again and again in different churches is the political maneuvering that goes on behind the scenes. We lobby fellow church members to have the carpet changed to the color we’ve chosen. We “bless someone’s heart” even as we tell others they don’t have good sense when it comes to decorating the Fellowship Hall.

We get so focused on what we want that we miss loving others. We’re so intent on being right that we forget it’s much more important to include others than to have our own way.

The women knew exactly how they wanted it to be done. It was to be done the way it had always been done. They’d been decorating tables for funeral meals, bridal showers and church fellowship for years. They were tired but they soldiered on. No one could do it like them.

Until another woman joined the church. She had plenty of experience with arranging flowers and centerpieces. She carried a bright smile and she was always willing to help. It might have worked out if she’d stayed silent and just gone along with those in charge. When she dared to do something different, they let her know with harsh words and bruising assessments. She cried. They didn’t seem to care.

Is anyone surprised that she’s no longer a member of the church? Does anyone even care that those same ladies with the biting tongues are now too old and frail to do the things they valued so much? They retained control, they hurt someone who didn’t deserve their hateful words, and all to control a task that was always temporary.

Where was Jesus in all of that? He wasn’t there at all. He wasn’t invited. He wouldn’t have fit in anyway. Jesus was all about welcoming everyone to the table. Those ladies were all about exclusion.

Sometimes I see people fussing about things that just don’t matter. They get so upset about worldly things, about power and control and pride. We really cling to our pride. We place it high above kindness and mercy and inclusion.

We are all only servants here with one purpose: to bring glory to God. We are to care for His people and do good where we can. And we’re to get along with each other, refusing to let Satan divide us with pettiness.

The next time you get ready to tear someone down for disagreeing with you, think about it before you fling those words out. They can’t ever be taken back. They harm others and, in so doing, they hurt Jesus. Is that what you really intended?

July 30, 2018

Why Try to Fix Others?

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?”

– Matthew 7:3

It’s both amusing and aggravating, all wrapped up with sweet words designed to make a point without offense. Why do we believe we are better qualified to run someone else’s life than the person who is actually living that life?

And, here’s another question: Why do we believe it’s okay to stick our opinions into a conversation we weren’t invited to join? And why do we believe that our own lives are tidy enough that we’ve even got time to dictate how someone else should live?

If you don’t think this applies to you, it does. It applies to all of us. We’re just so quick to tell others how to think and feel, what kind of job they need, what type of food they should eat, even what brand of car they should buy. It’s as though we feel better about ourselves if we’re telling someone else what to do.

It also takes our focus off of our own issues. We don’t have to worry about that extra piece of pound cake when we’re lecturing someone else about all the fast food they eat. We don’t have to think about our own job situation when we’re telling someone else what type of job they should have. And we certainly don’t have to spend our own money when we’re telling someone else how to spend theirs.

It’s enough to strain the closest of relationships. I don’t need someone dictating my every move. How about you? That’s right. Most of us don’t need it.

A sweet lady I know has a son that has been in trouble more than out of it. She did all she could. She finally got help for herself, let go of trying to fix and control her son, and turned him over to God. Guess what? He’s out of trouble and appears to have completely turned his life around. What he needed most from her was space to grow up. When she gave him that, he actually did begin to accept responsibility for himself and change his life.

Another friend worries about a co-worker who is just so unhappy. She wants to fix this woman that she considers a friend. She wonders why the woman won’t listen, won’t change her eating habits and go back to church and just decide to be happy living where she’s at. Would you listen to someone – however well meaning – who constantly told you what you needed to do to “fix” your life?

It’s not about intentions. Both women had only the best of intentions. But sometimes the best gift we can give someone is to love them as they are and trust God to do any “fixing” He deems necessary.

We can’t fix anyone. It’s not our job. It’s God’s job. He doesn’t need your help and He doesn’t need my help. He’s God. And He’s good at it.

The only thing He’s told us to do is love people. Love draws more people to make right choices than anything else you could do. When you reject, criticize, and “guide” people incessantly, you push them away. And you make them dig their trenches a little deeper. We’ve all got that stubborn streak in us that doesn’t want anyone else to tell us how to live.

So, the next time you feel an urge to get that speck out of someone else’s eye, look in the mirror instead. That plank you see might take a while to get out.

June 8, 2018

Good or Bad Fruit?

“Yes, just as you can identify a tree by its fruit, so you can identify people by their actions.” – Matthew 7:20

The other day I found a peach tree loaded with big, fat peaches. I was amazed and delighted. I gathered an entire basket and consider myself beyond blessed.

It’s not that I didn’t know the peach tree was there. Obviously, I did. It’s been around for many years. It’s just that every year it makes very few, very small peaches that are almost always either rotten or with worms. Over the years we have gathered only a few that were edible.

I wasn’t expecting anything different this year. Why would I? Can a tree that has never produced good fruit suddenly produce such a beautiful abundance? Apparently so.

People aren’t that much different. As Jesus noted in this parable, a good tree can’t produce bad fruit and a bad tree can’t produce good fruit. But, and it’s a big but, sometimes we judge without really knowing what a tree, or a person, is capable of doing.

My parents were wonderful people who didn’t think too much of me. They loved to tell what I couldn’t do. Sometimes I lived down to their expectations. Sometimes I forged ahead anyway. And sometimes I didn’t even try. It was a constant battle between who I could be and who they needed me to be.

It was never about me. Not really. It was about their need to control me and to feel good about themselves for “helping” me. They did help me sometimes. And I helped them too. It’s funny how that all works. Sometimes the person you like the least becomes the person you need the most.

Lately I’ve become more observant about the people in my life. There are those dear friends who accept me as I am. And there are those who need to remake me to fit their needs. We all have people who fill both those categories. And we all fill both of those descriptions for others.

We may say we accept and support someone, even though we’re doing all we can to influence them to our way of thinking. We’ve all done it. Maybe even laughed about it. Maybe tried to justify our actions.

And maybe our desire comes from all the right reasons. We don’t want to see someone we care about make a mistake. But what does a mistake look like? Obviously, excessive drinking or drug use qualifies as a mistake. So does uncontrollable anger.

But what about when someone changes jobs and you don’t agree with the switch? What about when someone moves and you don’t think they should? What about when someone takes a different path and you’re certain they should remain the same? When does their right to choose become your right to force?

We can’t fix people. We can’t turn people into who we’ve decided they need to be. And the harder we try, the more we push them away. Sometimes a bad tree will continue to produce bad fruit. God is the only One who can change their hearts to do good. And sometimes a good tree will surprise us with producing really good fruit. It’s amazing what someone can do when we get out of the way and let them bloom.

April 14, 2018

Bickering Destroys Us

If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other. – Galatians 5:15

A few years ago conversations turned heated in the contemporary worship committee meetings. The argument was always the same: Do we start a second service or continue with just one contemporary service each week.

Those in favor got ugly in their pursuit of being right. They offered up studies and statistics. They vowed to do whatever was necessary, to commit whatever hours were needed, to make it happen.

The other side argued that the church didn’t need a fourth service. The attendance in the one contemporary service didn’t justify adding a second one. We likely wouldn’t increase overall church attendance with the additional service. Oh, and one of the praise bands couldn’t be available at the second service.

The second service was added. Members of the second praise band continued for the first service until the criticism and putdowns got to be too much. They left the church, taking their gifts and talents with them.

Did we add members to the church? No. All we added was discord. Ironically, one of the most vocal proponents of the second service now desperately wants to see it end. He’s decided that the extra work, something he was so glad to do before it began, is just too much. But it’s a lot easier to add a service than to take one away.

One Sunday school class has been around for a long time. It began when its members were young professionals with small children. Now they are elderly retirees, with grandchildren and, in some cases, great grandchildren. They’ve earned the right to get their way on any and all issues. Just ask them.

The thermostat must be set according to their needs. It doesn’t matter that the class next door must literally use blankets in the summer because their classroom is so cold. They aren’t interested in a happy medium where everyone is satisfied. And they’re glad to hatefully tell anyone that.

The other day I was showing someone photos from a wonderful Easter play. She and her husband are new to town and I wanted to encourage her to attend our church. Two women quickly chimed in: At least we got to sing our song. The pastor didn’t want us to do it but we needed the time to get “Jesus” on the cross. It was just such a mess. I don’t know why the pastor was so difficult about it.

Seriously? That conversation should have stayed at the play rehearsal. No one needed to know about the disagreement. And certainly not someone looking for a church home. Is that who we are? Is that what we’ve become? Is it any wonder that people are staying away from churches? Who wants to be a part of that?

God turned that play into something that was powerful and moving, a live illustration of how Jesus suffered and what He did for us. It wasn’t about a song; it was about a Savior. How could they miss that?

We are so intent on getting our own way, on demanding that our voices be heard. All the outside world sees is the ugliness of destruction. We are destroying ourselves with our petty differences and need to be in control. Those who constantly grumble among themselves are destined to ultimately fail.

April 7, 2018

Add A Little Gratitude

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. – Colossians 3:17

What are you grateful for? Really. Have you ever stopped to consider all that you have, the people who bless your life, the things that make your days easier? Or are you like the Israelites in the wilderness, complaining about everything and never being satisfied with anything?

Some people refer to this as the glass half-empty or the glass half-full. It’s how you see life. But many people who might see themselves as optimists aren’t really. How do I know? Because they complain all the time. Because they always look to the next thing to make them happy. Because they talk about their life as though the good old days have already passed on by.

What’s missing in your life? Maybe a spouse or children? How about a good job or even a job you love? Are you satisfied with your home? Your bank account? Are you longing for a vacation? Maybe the latest technology gadget? What are you so focused on that you’re missing the joy of today?

Ah, joy. Yes. That simple little word. Joy comes from the Lord. We’d just like a little extra in the form of blessings. But the thing is nothing will ever satisfy us until we are content in God. We’ll always crave what we don’t have until we realize that our worth doesn’t come from our financial assets, our social status, or our address, but rather from our status as a child of God.

There’s another way we show how ungrateful we are though we might not always see it that way. It’s when we try to control the people and events around us. Are you someone who is always trying to tell others what to do? Do you think you know better how to do just about anything than anyone else? Do others frustrate and anger you when they won’t go along with what you think is right?

It’s not about us. We know that. Most of the time anyway. But we really do want it to be about us. We are like spoiled little children, wanting to get our way all the time. We forget that the best things come when God’s children work together for His glory. If you’re not content to step back and work with others and really listen to what they say, well, maybe it’s because you need to get a little gratitude in your life. Other people are rarely as stupid as you think. Be grateful that you really don’t have to do it all alone and welcome the help of others.

Gratitude has a way of softening our hearts and changing our attitudes. It’s difficult to be upset when you truly notice all that’s good in your life. Gratitude puts things in perspective. It makes you realize what’s important.

Do you want to be happy? The next time you start to complain or lament what you don’t have, think about something you are grateful for. It could be something as simple as the roses blooming next door. Or it might be the soup you had for lunch or the child you just tucked into bed. Maybe it’s kisses from your dog or the sunshine coming down on your face. There’s always something to thank God for. Always.

February 22, 2018

Let God be God

There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death. – Proverbs 14:12

We like to tell other people what to do, don’t we? We like to sit on our throne and pass judgement on those around us.

Of course, we don’t view it that way. We only want what’s best for them. They just can’t see the truth like we do. And don’t they read the Bible? Don’t they see the wrong in what they’re doing?

There’s one major problem in always knowing how other people should live their lives: it’s embedded in idolatry of ourselves.

Wait a minute, you’re saying about now. No. I don’t idolize myself, you’re insisting. Are you sure about that?

Why do you think that you have the right to judge others or to instruct them as to how they should live their lives? We’re not talking about a preacher speaking from the pulpit or a teacher leading a class. We’re talking about individuals who go around getting angry because others aren’t living their lives the way we think they should.

I have had so much “advice” in recent years. What about you? People are quick to tell me what to do and how to do it. They aren’t quick to actually help when it comes to work. They aren’t there to cope with the sorrow and everyday heartaches. Not at all. They’d rather stand outside and point their fingers at what they don’t understand and what isn’t any of their business.

How about you? Do you have people who want to manage your life too? Are they giving you unsolicited advice about jobs or child-rearing or how to take care of your lawn?

I have a neighbor whose name I don’t even know. He and his wife seem nice enough except that he has decided that with my Daddy gone on to heaven that it’s his job to give me advice about cows. Except the man doesn’t own cows. He’s never owned cows. His comments are condescending and ignorant.

I’ve tried to be nice but mostly I just avoid him. I don’t want to deal with him. Do I ever need advice? Absolutely. And when I do, I seek out people who own livestock. I ask questions from people who deal with cows every single day.

He means well. I tell myself that again and again. I know it’s not about me. Really, it isn’t. It’s about his need to control the actions of someone else. People who try to direct the lives of others are all about control.

We all probably have someone like that in our lives. Maybe we are that person for someone else. We are making ourselves an idol, believing that we know better than anyone else, including God.

Ah. There it is. God is the One in control. God is the One directing our steps. God is the One who knows the right path for each of us.

Sometimes we believe truly, deep down in our hearts, that we know the best path for someone else. We don’t. Certainly, pray about your concerns. If the person has taken a wrong path, the Holy Spirit will convict them. But whatever you do, get out of the way and Let God be God. Trust Him with your own life and the lives of those around you.

May 7, 2016

Thoughts Control You

How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me

-- Psalm 13:2

What’s on your mind today? What keeps coming up as you travel through your day? Who has upset you? What has happened that you keep rehashing again and again?

Because whatever is on your mind is what controls you.

So many of our battles actually take place in our mind. We go over and over events that are past -- some good and some bad -- and never seem to move on. Maybe you’ve met someone who still lives for the glory days of high school, even though it was years ago. Or maybe you know someone who suffered through a divorce a decade ago and yet the bitterness comes out again and again.

Or maybe you spend your time worrying about what might happen in the future. It’s so easy to imagine all kinds of scenarios that aren’t likely to ever occur. We waste so much time and energy on a future we can’t predict. Do what you can to prepare and trust God to see you through the rest. In other words, let it go.

We can’t possibly enjoy today when our minds are on the past or the future. Life is what happens when we’re grieving the past and planning the future. Focus on life.

It’s especially hard to enjoy today when we’re trying to come to terms with heartbreak. That person is still gone every minute of every day. There is a void there where a loved one once stood. That’s where the choice comes: Do we wallow in what we can’t change or rejoice over memories and the promise of an eternal reunion?

That sounds callous doesn’t it? I don’t mean it to be. Even years after the loss, grief can come crashing in suddenly and fiercely. But the choice not to dwell there belongs to you. It comes with taking control of your thoughts rather than letting the grief control you.

The same is true with betrayal. It’s easy to get caught up in thoughts of revenge and justice. For what purpose? God avenges His own. Don’t let someone who betrayed you continue to control you by occupying your thoughts. Trust God to handle it in His time. He will.

King David frequently poured out his anguish and grief to God. We can learn from him and do the same. There’s something so freeing in giving God all that’s in the past, all the worries for the future, our grief and our brokenness. It allows us to refocus our minds on today and the joy that comes anew each morning with His Presence and our love for the One who saved us.

March 10, 2016

Resist The Devil

7 Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8 Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9 Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. 10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up. -- James 4:7-10

Who controls your life? You? God? Satan? Whoa! Wait a minute, you’re saying about now. Satan isn’t in control. I am. Or at least God is. Not Satan. I’m a Christian!

Okay. But that doesn’t mean you aren’t allowing Satan to push your buttons, disrupt your mind and your thoughts, and cause disruptions in your life. Satan causes havoc and ruins so many things.

I just watched the movie War Room -- again. I’m not sure how many times I’ve seen it. I love its message because the power of prayer is something we so often overlook. We pray when we are desperate rather than praying before we reach that point.

In one scene, she is praying and repeating “resist the devil and he will flee from you.” Then she gets up and basically calls the devil out and tells him to leave her house because Jesus is in charge now. How powerful! Why don’t we all do that?

Because we don’t recognize what Satan is doing. We blame others. In this same move, she blames her husband for everything but wise Mrs. Clara tells her to pray for her husband and blame the devil. Amazing things start to happen when she truly does pray for her husband. She stops trying to fix him and turns him over to God. Truly.

Ah, there we are back to that control issue. We really don’t want to give that up. How much grief do we cause ourselves and others by trying to control what we can’t control? We can’t control the actions of others. We can’t control events around us. We can’t control much of anything beyond ourselves.

The good part is that we’re not supposed to control those things anyway. We aren’t called to fix anyone or anything beyond ourselves. We’re to pray for people, resist the devil, and focus on God.

So stand up and fight -- with prayer. True, heartfelt prayer. That’s where you fight for those you love. That’s where you fight when you’ve been wronged. In prayer. Trust God to handle it all and He will. Always. He will.

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Are You Playing God?

There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death. -- Proverbs 14:12

“I can handle it.” He’s thrown that statement at me too many times to count. So imagine my surprise when Pastor Rob used those very words in an illustration of someone who is trying to play God.

Oh, wow. That was such a God-speaking moment. But, you know, it fits. I’ve often viewed his pride and arrogance as frustrations. I’ve never quite thought about those qualities as coming from someone trying to control everything around them.

Pastor Rob told us that the more insecure a person is the more he wants to control others and their lives as well. I see that so clearly now. One of my greatest frustrations is his repeated attempts to control my life. I just never viewed it as his own insecurity shining through.

It is funny how sometimes we “see” what others should do and be so much more clearly than how we “see” ourselves and our own frailties. It’s that whole plank in our own eye versus speck in someone else’s eye. We criticize and condemn others even though our own lives are filled with opportunities for improvement.

Mostly I laugh it off. I have to in order to stay sane. But it hurts. Really. It does. When everything you do, everything you say, everything you dream, is met with criticism and ridicule. Some days I’m tempted to throw in the towel and hand the responsibility off to someone else. Other days I’m determined to stick it out because I believe I’m where God has called me to be.

I wish I were talking about a child because children grow up. But I’m talking about an adult who is slowly losing the independence he values so highly. And it’s all my fault, probably because I’m the only one brave enough to try and help him when he is determined to do it himself.

He resents my participation, much as he has always resented my presence. He needs me. Some days he even acknowledges that fact by “allowing” me to help him. But mostly there is drama and resentment and ugly comments that seem to bury themselves deep in my heart.

He knows best. He always has. Just ask him. Except none of us know everything and everybody needs help every now and then. He’s just so accustomed to doing it all by himself, refusing to acknowledge even God’s hand in his life, that this new stage is causing him to lash out in anger.

He is a Christian. He says so and mostly I believe him. Either way, it’s between him and God. But I don’t believe any of us get through this life without coming to understand how little control we actually have. God is in control of everything but we can’t control much of anything. Not the weather. Not the actions of other people. Not whether our employer stays in business or our spouse remains faithful or our loved ones live long lives.

We think we know more than we do. We think we control more than we do. We hold on to those things when really the greatest freedom comes in relinquishing our perceived control and handing it over to Almighty God who does control the universe.

Friday, July 6, 2012

Trust God With The Details

Next Paul and Silas traveled through the area of Phrygia and Galatia, because the Holy Spirit had told them not to go into the province of Asia at that time. Then coming to the borders of Mysia, they headed for the province of Bithynia, but again the Spirit of Jesus did not let them go. -- Acts 16:6-7

Who controls your life? Maybe you’re one of those who control your own destiny. Or maybe a spouse or parent controls your life. Maybe it’s a boss, a company, the military, or even the economy.

Actually, it’s none of the above. God controls your life -- if you’re wise enough to give it over to Him to be used for His purpose.

Some folks just aren’t comfortable with that. Even Christian folks. Even, sometimes, pastors and other church leaders. It’s not that they don’t trust God. It’s just that they don’t trust God to do what they want Him to do. It’s like they feel they need to help Him out a little bit, just until He sees the light.

I know. It’s laughable and just so very misguided. God will do what God will do. Period. And most of the time I’m really glad about that because He truly does know best. When I get a little upset, it’s almost always when He’s calling me to do something I’d really rather not do.

Someone once asked me if I felt threatened when the former teacher of the Sunday school class I lead came to visit. Why would I? As I explained, God called me to teach the class. I wasn’t expecting it but He did it anyway. And I’ll teach it until He tells me not to. End of story.

Another man is determined to do good for God in all things. I watch him sometimes and I am amazed. He truly has a wonderful heart and is open to new ideas. Except that he wants to micromanage everything and everyone around him. It can’t last. He’ll burnout eventually. Unfortunately, that will probably come after he’s alienated other wonderful people.

It all comes back to each of us doing whatever God has called us to do. Not what God has told someone else to do.

That’s difficult to do sometimes. It’s that control thing. It’s really hard to let go and trust others to do things the way we want them done. We’re afraid that someone will drop the ball and we’ll be left with a mess to clean up. Truly, it sometimes happens that way.

But what about those times when everyone does his or her part and it all just comes together and God’s glory shines brightly? God is in control and He knows what He’s doing. Don’t just trust Him with the big things in your life. Trust Him with the details and let others do the same.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

God’s Got It Under Control

Give your burdens to the LORD, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall. -- Psalm 55:22

Some days just seem so overwhelming. Everybody wants something. Nobody is satisfied. Financial pressures pound you. What can go wrong does. Need I go on?

Most of life is just stuff that keeps happening. We know that. The laundry never gets completely done because by the time we finish something else is dirty. Same with grocery shopping. It’s one of those tasks that never ends.

Other things aren’t so easy to brush aside. A lingering illness. Financial stress. Job insecurity. Marital discord. Family feuds. These sorts of things rock our very foundation -- unless we are firmly grounded in our LORD.

A dear friend turned down a new job just two months ago because it would have meant a serious pay cut. Now she’s found out she could lose her job to staff cutbacks in May. She’s scared and kicking herself for not taking the other job.

Another woman can give a detailed list of all the jobs she’s applied for. She’s still looking. Her finances are dwindling lower and lower and she’s about to give up hope.

A man struggles with depression as his health fails. He wonders why God brought him this far only to abandon him to an incurable cancer. His wife has gone home and his daughters live far away. He feels so alone.

Sometimes I try to joke that if stress kills, then I’m already dead. Except it isn’t funny. Stress is real and can seem to control us unless we turn it over to God. That sounds a lot easier than it is.

We are taught to take control of our own lives. Except many of us feel we have no control over our days. We are told to toughen up and just deal with whatever is happening. But the endless days make the tough façade harder and harder to hold up.

The good news is that God hears our silent cries. He holds out His arms to life us up and hold us tight. And we can learn to give our cares, our worries, our concerns to Him. One day at a time. Sometimes one moment at a time. Refusing to allow Satan to control our minds.

So tell God you want Him to take over. Give Him everything that seems impossible to fix, to deal with, to accept. Let Him take care of it. God loves you so much. And He is all powerful. Never compare what you can do to what God can do because He can do anything. So relax. God’s got it all under control.

Saturday, March 31, 2012

Let God Set You Free

Our old sinful selves were crucified with Christ so that sin might lose its power in our lives. We are no longer slaves to sin. -- Romans 6:6

Sin is no longer your master, for you are no longer subject to the law, which enslaves you to sin. Instead, you are free by God’s grace. -- Romans 6:14

Freedom. Wow. That just seems so amazing. Unbelievable really. How can I be free from the sins that haunt me? How can I take a different path, make better choices, and still be me?

But I’m not me anymore because Christ lives within me. His strength powers and protects me. Satan may offer temptations but Jesus can deflect them all. I can resist that piece of chocolate cake. I can walk away from that insult. I can find time and strength and peace.

I can also do things I never thought possible. Because it isn’t me doing them, it’s Christ. And He can do anything. So when He calls me to do something, I go. I get scared and uncertain sometimes but I know those doubts come from Satan. God wouldn’t call me to do something without giving me everything I need -- including His Presence -- to make it happen.

I have heard so many people tell me what they cannot do. I don’t doubt them. Because they’re trying to do things through their own power and will. They don’t understand why they keep failing at the same things. It’s because they’re trying to do it on their own.

What happens when we give it to God? Sometimes we think it’s crazy to expect God to keep us from that extra scoop of ice cream. Why? God wants us to be healthy. That includes learning to crave Him instead of food.

The same is true of other addictions. Or anger. Or frustration. Or worry. The list goes on and on. God can take whatever holds us captive and turn us into something new. And, in doing so, God removes the power of sin from our lives and replaces it with His power.

How can this be? Strength for this moment. Prayer for this minute. Scripture for this day. When you’re faced with a choice, give it to God. When you’re struggling with your actions, give it to God. One time after another time after another time.

So stop beating yourself up because you can’t do something, or refrain from something, on your own power. Give it to God. Let it go. You are free from whatever held you captive the minute you trust God.

Friday, December 2, 2011

Give God Control and Stop Worrying

Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret -- it leads only to evil.

-- Psalm 37:7-8

How often do you worry about something? Anything? Do you worry about money? Do you worry about the safety of your children? Do you worry about what to take to the church potluck dinner?

You don’t really trust God, do you? You don’t trust him to provide for you If you did, you wouldn’t worry.

I’ve always been a worrier. I’ve joked that I should start a business offering to pay people to worry for them. I try not to worry. I know I’m not supposed to but I can’t seem to help myself.

Then God told me why I’m such a worrier: control. Excuse me? I never would have paired worry with control until God told me I was focusing on the wrong issue. No wonder I can’t seem to stop worrying.

I don’t see myself as a person who needs to be in control. In fact, that’s laughable in many ways. I don’t control much of anything in my life right now -- whether it’s when I wake up or how I spend my day. All my time seems to be spent on doing for others. I am most definitely not in control of my life.

But neither is God. Maybe I should put that another way. God is in control but most of the time I live my life as though He isn’t. Why worry about others, about needs and desires, about things I can’t control? And why worry about the impact of others on my days? Certainly I can’t control them and worrying means I’m not trusting God to take care of it all.

I don’t know if it’s possible to live life without worrying about anything. I don’t know if I can give everything over to God’s control and trust Him to handle not just the big issues of my life but the smaller ones as well. I want to. And mostly I think I do. But then I worry, I show that I don’t trust God at all.

So I’m making a promise to God and myself to turn it all over to Him -- everything. I’m sure I’ll slip up. I know I’ll still worry sometimes. I’ve spent a lifetime doing it and I’m not so naïve as to think I can just stop without any slipups. I have to chuckle even as I write that. God can do anything and I can do anything with Christ, who strengthens me.

Friday, October 7, 2011

God Is In Control

David didn’t leave one person alive in the villages he attacked. He took the sheep, cattle, donkeys, camels, and clothing before returning home to see King Achish. -- 1 Samuel 27:9

We don’t think too much of King David as murderer. Oh, sometimes we remember that he sent Bathsheba’s husband to the front lines of war to make sure he died. Maybe we excuse that because he married Bathsheba, their baby died as punishment, and they later had a son, Solomon, who became a wise king. But murderer? We don’t use that term to describe David.

During this passage of Scripture, David went to live with the Philistines to get away from Saul. God didn’t sent him there. David was just tired and afraid. He was running away. Most of us can relate to that. At some point, we all run away from something. Sure you do. It doesn’t have to be physically moving in the opposite direction. Avoidance counts as another way of running away.

Beth Moore brings up an interesting point in her study on David. She suggests that he killed all the people in the towns he raided not just to keep them from talking but because he needed to feel like he had some control over his life. He couldn’t kill Saul because the king was God’s anointed. And he couldn’t kill his enemies the Philistines because he needed to live in their country for safety. So he killed the people in the towns he raided.

Lack of control causes us to do quite a few things that can seem out of character. Someone who isn’t in control in her marriage, might exert extreme control over her children. A man who is a lowly employee may need to rule his family with a iron hand. We humans need to have control over something. Don’t we?

But what happens when we don’t have something to control? We lash out at someone or something. Really. Even you. Ever yelled at the dog because someone else did something you didn’t like? Ever lashed out at your child because your boss made you mad? Most of us have gotten upset with the wrong person because we just needed to get all that anger and frustration out of us. Because feeling out of control is scary and unnerving and we don’t want to be in that place.

Except we’re never in control of anything. Thing about it. God is the only one with complete control. Really. Everything else is just illusion and fantasy. It’s why some days I start with a plan and, at the end of the day, nothing I planned came to be. You probably know exactly what I’m talking about.

David’s real issue, though, wasn’t about control. It was about trust. David didn’t trust God to keep him safe from Saul. I understand that too. God waited 15 years to end Saul’s life. But God didn’t abandon David during that time. Instead, God allowed David to mature and learn how to be a king.

So next time you’re tempted to lash out or take extreme control in a situation, don’t. God knows what He’s doing. Look around. Seek His wisdom and His lesson. He’s with you and don’t ever doubt that God is in control.