July 21, 2023

 

We Are All Pharisees

 

The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed, ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people – robbers, evildoers, adulterers – or even like this tax collector.’

– Luke 18:11

 

How many times have we read the parable of the Pharisee and the tax collector and condemned the Pharisee for thinking his sins weren’t as bad as the tax collector’s sins? How many times have we been the Pharisee by justifying our own sins while soundly condemning the sins of others?

 

Ouch. Most of us live pretty good lives, at least according to ourselves. We try to be good people. We don’t go around shooting people or robbing others or blatantly telling lies. We help those we think need it. We pray sometimes. We may even read the Bible. But we still don’t get it.

 

I’m struggling now to show grace and mercy to someone who is committing adultery. I see the heartbreak he has inflicted on his wife and children. It drags on and on as he tries to discover what will make him “happy.” I honestly would like to throttle him. I suspect God would like to throttle me sometimes too.

 

No. I haven’t committed adultery. But I have judged the sins of another. I have condemned what is not mine to condemn. I have failed to show love and grace, mercy even, as I have held onto my anger. My sins are great.

 

The hard truth is that we are all Pharisees. Pastor Adam Hamilton described himself as a recovering Pharisee who sometimes falls off the wagon. That is true of all of us. We are quick to point fingers, gossip, and condemn the sins of someone else all the while justifying our own sins.

 

I am not excusing his actions. But I also refuse to excuse my own. I pray that God will open both of our hearts so that we may be healed. That’s where he’ll find “happy.” That’s where I will find it too.

July 16, 2023

 

Are You Willing?

 

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. – 1 John 1:9

 

I was reading a devotional the other day about those who refuse to confess their sins. You know them. They refuse to take responsibility for their actions. They are forever pointing fingers and blaming others for their decisions. They don’t change because they don’t see the need to do so.

 

It really hit home with me because I love someone who is doing just this. He has destroyed his family and, likely, will eventually destroy himself because he won’t admit that he did something wrong.

 

We tend to think of people like this as drug addicts or thieves but that’s not always the case. Sometimes it’s someone who commits adultery. It might be someone who can’t manage money and bankrupts themselves and their family. It could be someone who always lies just because they can.

 

It can also be someone who is abusive. How often do abusers blame their victims? How many times do rapists say it wasn’t their fault?

 

Jesus offers us a lifeline. He beckons us forward to confess our sins. He promises to forgive us and help us to be different, to do different, if we will only draw near to our Savior. It might be the hardest thing we ever do. It will also be the best thing we could ever do.

 

In my loved one’s case, he’s still pointing fingers and blaming others. He’s angry and lashes out at those around him. He wants to be “happy” but he’s the unhappiest he’s ever been. No one can reach him. Jesus waits but for now He’s on the sidelines.

 

Do you know anyone like that? Maybe you are that person? Does anger consume you? Is everything bad that happens always someone else’s fault? Are you putting yourself before everyone you claim to love?

 

Jesus waits. He’s ready to help you. But first you have to confess your sins. You must accept responsibility. You have to lay down your pride and admit you don’t have all the answers. Jesus has the answers. He alone can free you and heal you. Are you willing to let Him?

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Hypocrites Repeat Mistakes

The wicked conceive evil; they are pregnant with trouble and give birth to lies. They dig a pit to trap others and then fall into it themselves. -- Psalm 7:14-15

She holds herself up as a righteous woman. She casts a haughty glance down at the sinners who surround her. She spends her days watching preachers and teachers on television. She reads her Bible daily.

And yet she sins. Adultery haunts her past. And her present. She can’t seem to get beyond the desire for something different. To be someone else.

Her choices tend toward users. She feels in control as she spends money on her lovers. They stay until the money is gone and then so are they. She is alone…again. Except for the husband who has finally had enough.

She has forgiven herself and tells all who listen that God has forgiven her. Still, she is a hypocrite. Because she refuses to extend the same grace she claims to those around her.

Most days I understand that this arrogance of faith really comes from a deep rooted insecurity. She and her siblings were abused children and all have carried scars into adulthood. It isn’t an excuse but certainly explains how someone so aloof could give themselves away so freely.

Why do some people think that forgiven sin doesn’t matter anymore? Refusing to step up, to make amends, to admit wrong, only means that she hasn’t really taken responsibility. She’s keeping her sin at a distance, pretending that it has gone away. Until she does it again. And again.

It isn’t just this woman. And it isn’t just adultery. A friend’s son is once again in prison on a drug conviction. His first conviction came with plenty of excuses and blame. He wanted help but couldn’t get it so he robbed a store so he could get help.

He never accepted responsibility for what he’d done. It wasn’t his fault he was a drug addict. It wasn’t his fault he’d robbed a store. Nothing was his fault. He got out of jail and it wasn’t long before he was right back again. Still blaming anyone but himself for his own actions.

God offers us mercy and grace. He extends forgiveness when we repent and ask. But He expects us to learn and grown from where we’ve been so that we won’t repeat the same mistakes again and again.

We are all sinners. We all fall down. Don’t hold yourself up as superior to others and don’t blame other people for your own actions. Accept responsibility and ask God for strength, wisdom and guidance to keep you from making the same mistakes again.