October 5, 2018

How Well Do You Listen?

To answer before listening – that is folly and shame. – Proverbs 18:13

He thinks he’s a good listener. Just ask him. The only real problem is that he listens to respond, not to understand. He’s so busy thinking and talking that he fails to really hear or comprehend anything that’s said to him.

How many of you know someone like that? Just about everyone. They don’t see it, of course. They don’t know why people pull away. But who wants to always have a conversation with someone who basically ignores what you say?

I wonder if God thinks that about us sometimes. We’re so busy telling Him what we want, what He should, how our lives should go, that we forget to listen to what He wants from us. Or, maybe, we know we’ve “heard” God tell us what we wanted to hear. Don’t shake your head no. We’ve all been there.

The hard truth is the only true way to discern God’s will is to shut up and listen. We can meditate on Bible verses. We can quiet our minds. We can open our hearts to hear something we didn’t want to hear or something we never imagined.

A dear friend is always quick to remind us that when God closes one door, He always has something better in mind for us. How many blessings have we missed because we were so busy telling God what to do that we passed right by the better something He wanted to give us?

We could likely say the same thing about the pastor’s sermon, the Sunday school lesson or any number of opportunities we have to learn and grow in Christ. Why do we never think the sermon applies to our lives? Why do we believe the Sunday school lesson doesn’t have anything to do with our lives? If God has put us in a position to hear something, then listen!

And take it a step further. How many times do we miss someone who is hurting, maybe even someone we truly care about, because we’re too busy talking to hear them? How many times do we miss hearing about a child’s day because we’re too busy texting or gaming or doing something “important” and we can’t hear his news?

We miss so much of life by not listening. We mess up again and again by responding before we hear, before we understand, before we even know the situation. Maybe the truth is we don’t want to hear. Maybe the truth is that we just don’t care what someone else has to say. How selfish is that?

What would happen if we started listening to others in an effort to actually hear them? What would happen if we asked questions and repeated things back to them so that we could really understand what they’re saying? It’s not about agreeing with people. It’s about hearing them. That’s basic communication. That’s caring about someone else.

March 2, 2018

Are You Listening?

But the house of Israel will not be willing to listen to you, for they are not willing to listen to me; because all the house of Israel have a hard forehead and a stubborn heart. – Ezekiel 3:7

And go to the exiles, to your people, and speak to them and say to them, ‘Thus says the Lord God,’ whether they hear or refuse to hear.” – Ezekiel 3:11

Are you listening to God? Or are you so focused on what you believe that you miss what God actually says?

The other day I shared a quote about how harsh judgements push people away from God while the light of God reflected in us draws people near. I was amazed, though not surprised, by how many people didn’t “like” the comment. Why? Because it spoke directly to what they do and say.

I am always appalled at the hatred and pure meanness that comes from the mouths and actions of people who claim faith in Jesus. I wonder if they have ever read the Bible. Do they really see and hear how Jesus dealt with people? Can’t they understand how He loved people first, then showed them a better way?

But their hearts have been hardened against the truth of the gospel. They are so busy judging that they miss the love they’re supposed to show. It doesn’t mean excusing sin. It means drawing people toward Jesus rather than pushing them away.

It’s not about Jesus. I know that even if they don’t. They’re too focused on being “right” to actually see and hear the way Jesus sees and hears us. We have failed to become like Paul, so filled with gratitude for what Jesus has done for us that we will do whatever we can to serve Jesus and spread His gospel to the lost and broken.

The Israelites didn’t want to hear Ezekiel either. This prophet, who was exiled to Babylon, spoke God’s truth but it fell on silent ears. We’re much the same. We prefer to surround ourselves with like-minded people rather than fill our hearts with His Word. We call ourselves justified. I call it being a modern-day Pharisee.

Now those are the ones who will definitely bring out the anger in Jesus. No matter how loving and kind Jesus was to the people who flocked to Him, Jesus was furious with the rule-makers who held themselves above everyone else. Attending church, wearing the right clothes and giving the right amount of tithe, doesn’t cleanse your soul from pride. Looking down on the masses, the liberals, those who are poor, doesn’t justify your condemnation of those you view as “lesser” than yourself.

God still speaks loudly to all of us if we will only listen. But our hearts are too hard and our eyes too blind to see the truth of His message. Our nation is falling away from His truth and the ones leading the way are those most loudly proclaiming Him as Lord. He is Lord – but not of their hearts.

What are you missing in His message today? What untruth do you believe because the conservative masses tell you it’s so? What are you doing to promote healing, to shine His light on this dark world? If you aren’t reaching out in kindness to those you consider to be the least, then you aren’t listening to anything He’s saying.

January 9, 2018

Carefully Consider Your Words

Those who guard their lips preserve their lives, but those who speak rashly will come to ruin. – Proverbs 13:3

She is one of the nicest people you could ever meet. I’m sure she would be glad to help others if she could. She is faithful to attend church and class. She is quick to laugh.

Except. You knew that was coming, didn’t you? She never stops talking. Ever. She cuts people off during discussions. Every comment someone makes she has something about herself to add. She is oblivious.

I don’t understand that. She readily admits people have at times told her to shut up. That I can understand. I’m just surprised she heard it because she sure didn’t learn from it.

I tell myself that she is lonely. Her husband works and her children are grown and live elsewhere. She stays at home alone so when she comes to class it is natural that she wants to talk. And talk. And talk. She can’t understand that her lack of friends is directly related to her inability to quiet her own tongue and listen to someone else.

She provides an important lesson to all of us. As the cliché goes, God gave us all one tongue and two ears so that we would listen twice as much as we speak.

How many times have I spoke when I should have listened? How many times did my friends need a supporting “ear” and I instead gave them my opinion? How many times have I spoken a truth that didn’t have the whole story?

What about you? I’m not alone here. I really think it’s almost impossible to live a life and not look back at times and regret words spoken that should have been kept inside.

That’s the thing about words. We can never unsay them. They can cut a heart into a million pieces. They can cause wounds that never heal. They can spread lies in such a way that the truth can never be restored.

It’s easy to say “I forgive you” for the words. It’s not so easy to erase the brain’s recorder that replays the hurt again and again and again. It just never goes away.

Measure your words carefully. When in doubt, remain silent. Remember to listen at least twice as much as you speak. Words are powerful weapons. Use them wisely.

February 23, 2016

God Always Listens

This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. -- 1 John 5:14

 One of the things I love most about God is that He listens to me. Yeah, I know. We focus a great deal on how we’re supposed to listen to Him. And that would be right. But in a world where we can sometimes get lost in the shuffle, having a Creator who takes time to listen is huge.

Today in a small group I witnessed a typical, though sad, exchange. One man was sharing about his very sick wife. Another woman kept cutting in to talk about herself. I realize she was trying to show empathy but the situations were totally different and it was just out of place.

Don’t we all do that sometimes? Someone else is sharing, whether good or bad news, and we want to make it about us? We want to share our good news or our sadness. There is a time and place for that. There is also a time to stay silent and let the other person talk.

On the other side, have you ever wanted to be a part of a conversation but no one would include you? Have you ever spoken to someone directly and had them ignore you? It hurts, doesn’t it?

We all want to be heard. We all want others to value us enough that they value what we say, even when what we say isn’t of much value to anyone else.

God is so awesome! He always listens. He always has time. He always cares. And, if after a time we quiet down enough to listen to Him, God always gives perfect advice.

So tell God about your day when no one else cares. Tell God about your worries and concerns, about your joys and successes. Tell God about how someone hurt you or about those dreams you’re afraid to share with anyone else.

God is Almighty God. He is Creator of the universe. God is powerful and strong and all knowing. And God is loving Father. Talk to Him. He wants to hear from you today.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Listen To God’s Voice

“Be silent and know that I am God! I will be honored by every nation. I will be honored throughout the world.” -- Psalm 46:10

Silence is a luxury for so many of us. I know. Most things we just sort of ignore, like city traffic and a television blaring nearby. Other things are blessings, such as children laughing or dogs playing.

Still, sometimes we fill our lives with busyness and noise in an effort to drown out the voice of God. We probably don’t even realize what we’re doing. It’s habit. We assume we can multi-task and accomplish Bible reading and television watching all at the same time. We can’t though.

I once had a friend who needed to fill every moment of every day with something. He was a contractor, so that took up much of his week. His weekends were scheduled with tours and museum visits and dinners out with friends. His weeknights were filled with movies and meetings. He never wanted to be alone and he never wanted to be without something to do.

It took me years to figure it out. He was afraid of what -- or who -- he’d find if he finally ended up alone in silence. He was a very unhappy man who tried to hide that from those around him. His frantic attempts to schedule all his moments escalated until I truly didn’t understand how he could keep going. I tried to talk with him but he wasn’t ready to listen.

We’ve lost track over the years but I pray he eventually found peace. Unhappiness can’t be buried forever under busyness. Eventually it all comes to the surface and that deck of cards crashes all around us. Better to face it with God and get through it, rebuilding on a solid rock, than to try and pretend.

It’s hard to face the silence sometimes. If we suddenly don’t have time to pray or read our Bible, that’s a giveaway that we’re avoiding God. The question is why. He’s probably trying to tell us something we’d rather not hear. We need to hear it anyway.

It’s also difficult sometimes to clear our minds so that we can hear God. Julia Cameron, in her book The Artist’s Way, recommended what she terms morning pages. They are three pages of writing down just stuff as a way to empty our souls and quiet our minds. Cameron developed them so that creative people could be open to, well, creativity. But those pages work wonderfully for those of us trying to get past all that rattling around in our minds so that we can hear God’s voice.

Quietness opens us up to all sorts of possibilities and blessings from our Creator. Solitude, when it’s just Him and us, is just the greatest gift. It builds and deepens a relationship unlike any other. As we kneel before His throne, we hear Him call to us and beckon us closer. Lean in and listen to what He has to say.