October 4, 2018

What Feeds Your Frenzy?

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things. – Philippians 4:8

We like to talk about addictions. Well, at least we like to talk about addictions that belong to someone else. We would never be addicted to anything. Not us. We know better.

Are you sure? There’s more than one type of addiction. It doesn’t have to be drugs or alcohol or gambling. It’s possible to be addicted to sex, drama, video games, center stage, political news.

What’s not so obvious is seeing ourselves in the mirror. We get so caught up in the frenzy that we don’t realize we’ve got a problem. Until we end up incredibly unhappy, even isolated, and we don’t know how we got to that place.

I have a sweet friend who is addicted to Fox News. I know. Maybe you like the news channel. It’s certainly possible to watch it without being addicted to it. She spends every waking moment tuned in. When she’s not focused on it, she’s watching shows like The View that leave her extremely agitated and upset. She is growing more and more unhappy with life and the condition of this world.

I’ve tried to help her. It makes me so sad to see her withdrawing more and more from the things that used to make her happy. I’ve encouraged her to turn the television off, to read her Bible, to have lunch with friends, or go for a walk. Anything to get her away from what upsets her so.

She can’t let it go. Or she won’t let it go. She’s becoming a Christian radical – does such a person exist – where she is obsessed with what she thinks others are doing to God and our country.

You probably know someone like her. It’s like a sickness that has invaded our country. We’re so busy defending God that we’ve forgotten He doesn’t need us to defend Him. We’re so busy promoting our own agendas, fueling our own anxiety, that we forget God is in control.

Why are we so worried? Don’t we trust God to handle whatever is happening in our nation, in our churches, in our hearts? Or do we just enjoy getting upset about things we can’t control?

My friend wasn’t always this way. She was sweet and kind, a devoted prayer warrior, an encourager. She loves Jesus. She does. I’m just not sure she trusts Him. Why? Because how can we get and stay so upset, how can we say we’ve turned issues over to God, and still get so angry and depressed every day about the same things?

We are in charge of what we focus our minds on. We can choose to fill our thoughts with Scripture. We can choose to think of the good and trust God to handle the good and the bad. Or we can let Satan fill our minds with rubbish, words of defeat, and news designed to fuel our anxiety.

The choice belongs to you. Are you going to hold on tight to your addiction or are you going to give it to God and trust Him with the outcome?

April 4, 2018

Peace In The Midst of Turmoil

I keep my eyes always on the LORD. With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken. – Psalm 16:8

Life has a way of getting out of control rather quickly, doesn’t it? One minute it seems that we’re in control, everything is going our way, then it all seems to fall apart without even a moment of warning.

A sweet friend wrecked her almost new car. Another friend did everything right but that didn’t stop the cancer diagnosis. Someone else faces another surgery because of infection. There’s a new group of people losing their jobs because of a store closing. Life, as they say, happens.

There is the co-worker who took credit for our idea. There’s the family member lashing out in jealousy. The spouse who has been unfaithful. The child who uses drugs, is being bullied at school or both. There’s the neighbor who is too loud or the fellow church member who wants to monopolize our time. We are overwhelmed.

It’s easy to get caught up in the drama, isn’t it? We can’t see a way out and panic fills us up in that deep place inside. We say all the right things. We smile as others try to encourage us. We pray frantically for a solution. And we worry like it all depends on us.

It’s so very easy to lose sight of Jesus. Our eyes dart from one issue to another. We race to keep up with all the demands. We cry out to God as we frantically race from one catastrophe to the next. What are we supposed to do with all these things, these chores, these people, on our plates?

Give it to Jesus. That sounds easy, doesn’t it? Just hand it over and walk away. Except we don’t do that. We say we’re handing it over, and maybe we do for a short time, then we take it back again. Deep inside we just don’t trust God to take care of it all. We don’t trust Him to do things the way we think they need to be done. We aren’t really sure He’s dependable and that He’ll take care of us like He promised.

We get overwhelmed when we move our eyes from Jesus to the world around us. We become frantic when we believe deep in our hearts that it all depends on us. We may say He’ll take care of it, but our hearts don’t really believe it’s true. Our panic gives witness to that.

Years ago I learned the secret to combatting those terrors that come in the quiet of the night. You know what I’m talking about. They’re the fears that keep you awake, the mind that won’t stop worrying about situations and people. Do you want to know my secret? Reading the Bible. It doesn’t seem to matter what passage or verse. It’s about seeking Him above all else. It’s about quieting your mind with His Word.

There’s a saying that I see sometimes on Facebook. It says that sometimes God quiets the storm and sometimes He quiets His child. I’m not sure who first said it but it sure is true. Do you want to know God’s peace? Seek Him out. Do you want to believe when you can’t see the way? Ask Him to strengthen your faith.

A sweet friend told me recently that she admired my strength. I had to laugh at that. I’m not strong at all. At least, I don’t feel that way. But I trust in Jesus. I believe that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I rest in His love, even when I can’t feel it. I trust in His truth, even when the way seems dark and I am afraid.

I cling to His promises, keeping my eyes fixed on the One with all the answers. It’s a struggle sometimes but that is where my strength and my peace come from. Somehow life doesn’t seem so hard when my focus is the God who created the universe. He can do anything. And He loves me. On hard days that’s really all I need to know.

February 10, 2016

Walk Away From The Drama

Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned. -- Titus 3:10-11

Have you ever noticed how drama just seems to surround some people? They always seem to be in the middle of a controversy or disagreement of some sort. And it’s never their fault.

They are what my dear counselor friend calls a pot stirrer. They pretend to walk the middle ground but in reality they are playing both sides against each other.

It goes like this: They have a conversation with one person, then repeat that conversation to someone else fully understanding that it will upset that person. Then they turn around and repeat the second conversation with the first person. And on and on until there is major drama going on.

And they do it every where they go.

They are the people in church who question everything and everyone, asking -- innocently, of course -- what the motives behind different decisions might be. They are the people who disagree with everything, encouraging others to follow their lead.

They are the people at work who gossip and finger point, stirring up trouble and making people dislike each other without ever really knowing each other.

And they are the people in our circle of family and friends who always have something ugly to say about everything. You know the type. They can’t believe what so and so said. They can’t believe what the hostess served. They can’t believe who the hostess invited. The gifts are all wrong. The temperature is too hot or cold. And on and on it goes.

Don’t let yourself be drawn into their drama. Recognize it for what it is -- their need to control and manipulate every situation. It’s about them. It’s not about you. And certainly it’s not about God.

So walk away. Refuse to participate. Be nice but don’t give them information they can use to stir things up. Drama isn’t good for anyone. And you really don’t have to play that game anymore.

March 19, 2015

Don't Be A Busybody

 

 

But let none of your suffer as a murderer, a thief, an evildoer, or as a busybody in other people's matters. -- 1 Peter 4:15

 

Isn't it interesting that Peter put busybody right up there with murderer, thief and evildoer? In a way, it fits. A busybody can murder a reputation, steal your peace of mind and cause all sorts of evil.

 

Make no mistake: We are all busybodies to some degree. We are. Have you ever asked questions about something that has nothing to do with you? Have you ever tried to find out what is going over at your neighbor's house -- without asking them directly? Have you ever been tempted to eavesdrop on a co-worker's phone conversation?

 

The reality television show business is booming. Why? Because we like to watch other people. We like to look down on their drama and be thankful it's not us. We like to tell other people how to live their lives. It's just so much easier than trying to live our own lives for Jesus.

Years ago a pastor got upset with a woman in the church who was a known busybody. Or gossip, if you will. She knew everything about everyone. There can be some benefit in that at times. On that particular Sunday she was still stinging from the pastor's words and determined to keep her mouth shut. Yet, she had something to say. Something important. Something we all needed to know. A church member had suffered a devastating stroke earlier that morning. He and his family needed prayer and, frankly, support in many ways. In the coming weeks there would be a house that needed to be remodeled and food that needed to be delivered. Another preacher explained to her the difference between passing on gossip and telling something we all need to know.

Of course, there are other times when we get involved in something that we really need to stay out of. Two people I know are getting married. I wish them the best. Unfortunately, I knew the man's first wife and know way more than he realizes I know. I look at him and see the same issues because he hasn't changed a bit. I fear history will repeat itself and this dear woman will be devastated. I've told myself repeatedly, "Not my monkeys, not my drama." I saw that on Facebook a while back and it helps me remember to stay out of it. Maybe this situation will work out for the best. Maybe it won't. But my nose needs to stay out of it. My mouth needs to stay closed.
 

What are your button points? What makes you want to get involved in other folks' business? Why do we have this "need" to insert ourselves into situations that aren't about us? Maybe it helps us focus somewhere besides what we aren't doing for Jesus. Maybe we'll feel better about ourselves if we focus on the faults of others.

Don't be a busybody. Find some Scripture and repeat it to yourself. Or tell yourself that whatever is going on in someone else's life really isn't your drama. Walk away. It's better for you and it's better for them.