Friday, June 29, 2012

We All Let Each Other Down

Now while he was in Jerusalem at the Passover Feast, many people saw the miraculous signs he was doing and believed in his name. But Jesus would not entrust himself to them, for he knew all men. -- John 2:23-24

Someone has almost certainly let you down. Maybe you’ve been lied to or misled. Maybe you counted on a friend to be there when you were sick or someone hurt your feelings or didn’t do enough or care enough or give you enough time. Whatever it was, you ended up unhappy and feeling rejected.

And, you know what? Someone else could say all those things about you. Because we let people down just like they let us down. Nobody can always do and say the right thing. And nobody can always be there when we need something or someone. It’s just that simple and that complicated.

It’s always interesting to remember in this age of Facebook friends and twitter followers that Jesus let only a few people close to Him. Jesus had thousands who followed Him, but He chose 12 to closely teach. That should tell us something.

We laugh about that 15 minutes of fame, but it’s just so true. One minute someone is your dearest friend and the next minute that same person is gossiping behind your back. Friend or foe? Sometimes it’s really difficult to tell the difference.

Most of us want to be good people. We want to be good friends. It’s just that we get so caught up in ourselves and what we want and what we think is best for us, that we neglect the wants and needs of others. We forget to love people first and put everything else behind that.

Not long ago I heard a radio minister telling a story about a man who just had to see the minister right that minute. The man had been going through some things and suddenly it all made sense. The minister wasn’t available but suggested that there were two other pastors available to speak with him. They wouldn’t do.

The man waited for the minister as he headed out the door, insisting again that he had to speak with him. The man couldn’t believe that anything else could be more important than his needs in that moment.

Ah, but there was. The minister’s son had a ballgame and he’d promised to be there. As the minister explained to the man, other pastors could counsel with him but his son only had one father and he was going to the game.

Life sometimes comes down to choices. Sometimes those choices hurt one person in order to please another. And sometimes we’re just selfish and thoughtless and we just don’t have a clue.

We let each other down. Jesus knew and expected it. We should learn from that. It won’t erase the hurt but it will help us understand and forgive.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

We All Fail Each Other

Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing. -- Proverbs 12:18

People fail us. Again and again they let us down. They say things that hurt our feelings. They lie to us. They talk bad about us. They shut us out. They ask too much of us. Nobody ever seems to get it just right.

They could say the same about us. Because nobody is perfect and none of us can meet all the needs of anyone, even those we love the most. We disappoint people just as they disappoint us. It’s just how it is.

Sometimes people expect Christians to live above that, to always do and say the right things, to never hurt anyone. That just isn’t realistic. While Christians should reach for a higher standard, we all fail. Expecting anything else is just unrealistic.

A wonderful couple that I know recently stopped attending church. I’m not sure who said what or how it all happened, but they felt let down by some of the people at their church. Rather than working through it, they simply stopped attending. They’re depriving themselves and their children of a wonderful church family because of a few people who didn’t meet their standards.

It would be nice if every other Christian shared our views on everything, especially when we attend the same church. But that just isn’t what happens. We are a diverse group of people. Just look at us. We’re all different ages and races. Some have lived here all their lives. Some have traveled the world and settled here by choice. None of it matters except that it does color our views.

I expect that divide may seem wider as the Presidential election gets nearer. Few things seem to ignite passions as much as politics. Unfortunately, we don’t leave our opinions at the door when we worship God. We alienate people. And that’s a really bad thing.

But is it reason enough to walk away from God? Because that’s what we’re doing when we refuse to attend church. He knows better than any of us how often humans fail Him and each other. The key is to keep trying. To move forward. To listen to God. To pray and to heal each other.

Sometimes the only option is to walk away and change church families. I understand that. Sometimes God calls us to make a change. But sometimes we’re only making excuses by holding people to a standard no one could ever meet.

We are all simply doing the best we can. We fail. And sometimes we fail big. It’s just part of being human and a work in progress for God’s kingdom. So maybe we should give each other a second chance. Maybe we should extend the hand of reconciliation. Maybe we should treat others with the same kindness and forgiveness we’d want them to extend to us.

Monday, March 21, 2011

God Knows Best

Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. -- Psalm 139:6

The town where I live has a small arts and crafts show each spring. I generally purchase a booth. I don't make a great deal of money but I enjoy seeing so many people that I know. Frankly, it's fun.

A few years ago God told me not to do this show. Really. It was like He was standing right in front of me and shaking his head. I begged and pleaded. Still, God's answer was no. I submitted to His will. I didn't send in my application and money. I was disappointed. I was really unhappy. I didn't understand why He didn't want me to participate in this wonderful event.

That year the rains came. The area where the event is staged was flooded and the event was canceled. Had I gone ahead and applied, I would have lost my booth fee. God told me not to participate because He knew what was going to happen. He was looking out for me and I greeted His help with a major attitude. And, yes, I did apologize and thank Him.

Isn't that frequently how it is? We want something so badly and yet God refuses to grant our wish. He just says no. I'm not talking about the big stuff here, like life and death. Though, I know from experience, that sometimes He says no on those issues too. I'm talking about the smaller stuff: jobs, relationships, even a special trip.

Walking with God means that sometimes we don't get what we want. Sometimes God has a different plan, a better plan, for us. We must remember even in the midst of our disappointment that God always wants to bless us. He wants to give us good things. It's just that what is best for us may not seem apparent right now. We may not even understand it until we get to Heaven. We just have to trust in His love and wisdom and know it'll all be okay. That we'll be okay.

I've never regretted following God but I sure have regretted not following Him. Even when it hurts.