Saturday, November 5, 2011

Family Hurts Go Deep

But the king said, “What do you and I have in common, you sons of Zeruiah? If he is cursing because the LORD said to him, ‘Curse David,’ who can ask, ‘Why do you do this?’”

-- 2 Samuel 16:10

Have you ever remained silent when someone else said horrible things about you? Have you ever walked away when someone did something really cruel to you? Did you think, deep down inside, that maybe you deserved the hateful words and cruel actions?

David was fleeing from his son Absalom. He refused to allow his soldiers to deal with Shemei, who was pelting the king with rocks and yelling curses at him. David thought that perhaps God had told the man to do so. After all, David hadn’t dealt well with Absalom. He hadn’t defended his daughter when she was raped by his oldest son. And he hadn’t dealt well with Absalom, after he murdered his brother. David was a wonderful king but a not-so-wonderful father.

And he felt it deeply. So do we. Nothing hurts as badly as family squabbles. None of us are perfect, especially when it comes to family dynamics and always knowing what to do and say when. We feel our failures. We mourn our mistakes. We feel we deserve the rejection we’re dealt because maybe, just maybe, we could have done something different.

Maybe we did the best we could. Maybe the other person encouraged our mistakes. Maybe it doesn’t matter what we do, it will always be wrong. Everyone has their own special place within the family structure. Sometimes that mantle of “failure” or “disappointment” or “not real bright” falls on you. And it hurts.

“It may be that the LORD will see my distress and repay me with good for the cursing I am receiving today.” -- 2 Samuel 16:12

God sees all things. He hears it all. He knows our hearts. He knows our mistakes and failures and He knows when we have been wronged. God works it all our in the end, defending His children and repaying the wrongs done to them. And punishing those who are wayward, seeking only to bring them back to His waiting arms.

David’s son wanted him dead. And David knew he shared at least part of the blame for that. It didn’t excuse Absalom’s actions. And it didn’t heal David’s heart. But this king turned to His God for comfort and strength and, eventually, restoration to the throne God had given to him.

When the hurt goes deep, when you wonder if maybe you deserve what you’re facing, turn to God. His arms are open wide. He offers strength and comfort and restoration to the life He planned for you all along.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

1. Let God Handle It

"My son, who is of my own flesh, is trying to take my life. How much more, then, this Benjamite! Leave him alone; let him curse, for the Lord has told him to. It may be that the Lord will see my distress and repay me with good for the cursing I am receiving today."

-- 2 Samuel 11b-12

Talk about turning the other cheek! David was King. The Lord's annointed. His son was trying to kill him. Saul's relative, Shimei, was cursing him. And still he wouldn't let his officials do anything about it. He trusted God to handle it. That's impressive.

I'm not sure I could do what David did. How about you? Could you walk away from someone who was cursing you? The man even through stones at David and his men. I'm afraid I would have had something to say. I might even have thrown a stone or two myself. I certainly wouldn't have resisted letting my soldiers teach the man a lesson. But David did the right thing. He trusted God to take care of the situation. And God did. (Shimei later apologized to David.)

The reason David was even at that place was because he was fleeing from his son Absalom, who had started a rebellion against David. Absalom, if you'll recall, was the same son who killed his brother. I wonder if this was pent-up anger at David for refusing to deal with Amnon, another son, after he raped Absalom' sister and David's daughter. Sounds like a soap opera.

Whatever the reason, David -- who was known as a fighter -- refused to fight his son. Just like he refused to kill Saul. He chose to let God handle the situation.

How much better the world would be if we all could do the same. We're so caught up in getting even or punishing someone else that we don't stop and consider what God wants. He has promised that He will right any wrongs done to His children. He has promised to care for us and deliver us from those who seek to destroy us. And God always keeps His promises.

So why can't we take a lesson from David and just let God handle people who are trying to destroy us?