July 16, 2022

 

Beloved

 

We love because He first loved us. – 1 John 4:19

 

It’s amazing what an adult remembers from childhood. The words that can stick and replay more than half a century later. A psychiatrist – my Mother’s doctor – told me I’d always have a difficult time with relationships because I didn’t have a model of what love is. Powerful words for an already broken teen.

 

He was right in so many ways. An unwanted child has no concept of what love and acceptance looks like. But he wasn’t counting on Jesus. Maybe that psychiatrist didn’t know God’s love.

 

But God Almighty met me in that dark place and placed His Spirit inside of me. And that made all the difference.

 

Was I miraculously healed? No. Did I struggle at times? Without a doubt. I was broken in ways that only Jesus could put back together. But He did put me back together. I do know what love looks like – and it was nothing like my childhood.

 

I have stumbled more times than I can count. I have made countless mistakes. I have repeatedly chosen people who said all the right things and then betrayed me because I didn’t know that I deserved more than the crumbs of affection I was given.

 

But Jesus never left me. Ever. When all the world condemned and cursed me for not being enough, Jesus stayed by my side. He held me close. He showed me what true love looks like.

 

Don’t ever settle for less than what you deserve. You are a child of God, beloved beyond anything you could imagine. When the dark world closes in and seeks to destroy you, hang on to Him. Jesus will never let you down.

May 26, 2016

Cry Out To Jesus

13 When Jesus heard what had happened, he withdrew by boat privately to a solitary place. Hearing of this, the crowds followed him on foot from the towns. 14 When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them and healed their sick.

15 As evening approached, the disciples came to him and said, “This is a remote place, and it’s already getting late. Send the crowds away, so they can go to the villages and buy themselves some food.”

16 Jesus replied, “They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat.”

17 “We have here only five loaves of bread and two fish,” they answered.

18 “Bring them here to me,” he said. 19 And he directed the people to sit down on the grass. Taking the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, he gave thanks and broke the loaves. Then he gave them to the disciples, and the disciples gave them to the people. 20 They all ate and were satisfied, and the disciples picked up twelve basketfuls of broken pieces that were left over. 21 The number of those who ate was about five thousand men, besides women and children. -- Matthew 14:13-21

It was one of those heartbreaking Facebook posts. A young woman posted that she was tired and worn out but she had to get over it and go get supper together for her kids. She and her husband are separated. He is in another state. She is struggling to be enough for her kids.

Have you ever been there? Maybe not exactly the same circumstances but where you are struggling to meet your obligations and responsibilities? Are you ever so tired and worn out that you just want to lay down and cry?

In this story, the disciples didn’t see how they could possibly feed all those people with two fish and five loaves. Well, they couldn’t. But Jesus could. Jesus gave thanks and multiplied it so that everyone had plenty and there was some leftover.

That’s what Jesus will do for us if we give it all to Him. Because even though we are not enough, He is more than enough. We have to merely rest in Him, to trust Him to see us through.

Sounds easy doesn’t it? There’s nothing easy about it. Satan works hard to keep us from the arms of Jesus. There is guilt and condemnation. There are the needs of children and spouses and work and home care. There are just so many people demanding attention.

That’s when we need to take a deep breath and cry out to Jesus. It doesn’t have to be a loud, audible cry. He hears our cry that rises up from deep within. He strengthens and comforts and helps us. We have only to ask. He is there.