February 14, 2016

True Friends Are Rare

A friend loves at all times,
And a brother is born for adversity.

-- Proverbs 17:17

The funeral home is a place you see folks you don’t see very often. Life is busy and good intentions get sidetracked. But these times when we come together to mourn we remember true friendship.

One woman and I shared memories of her mother, who went home more than a year ago. She was stubborn and opinionated, a wonderful Southern cook who would do anything for her friends. Anything. You never had to ask for her support. If you were her friend, she had your back. She didn’t need you to explain anything to her, she knew your heart and that was good enough for her.

Our latest friend to go home was the same way. People packed into the funeral home because she was always willing to help. She volunteered regularly. She loved children. She was a terrific cook. She was loyal and loving and she always had your back.

Last year another friend told us that when all was said and done, we’d be able to count our true friends on the fingers of one hand. She was almost right. Thankfully, we have a few more than that. But most people either didn’t want to get involved or tried to walk a middle line. Neither worked. A true friend is a brother -- or sister -- who is there when adversity hits.

Anybody can be a goodtime friend. You’ve probably got tons of them. They are the rah-rah people. Keep it light. Keep it fun. Keep it upbeat and they are very happy to be your friend. Just don’t expect them to be around if you get sick, lose your job, lose your marriage, have a child get in trouble. You know the type.

But it’s the real friends that touch your heart. The ones who come. The ones who sit with you while your mourn. The ones who help you when you’re too sick to help yourself. The friends who know you, warts and all, and love you just the same.

We buried a true friend yesterday and the world is a gloomier place without her presence. I am thankful she is singing in that heavenly choir and enjoying some much deserved time with Jesus. I am. But, oh, how sad we all are to face the days to come without her by our side.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Do Good To Others

"He who mocks the poor shows contempt for their Maker; whoever gloats over disaster will not go unpunished." -- Proverbs 17:5

I doubt there's a human anywhere that hasn't at some point wished something bad on someone else. It could be as simple as wishing that speeding motorist who almost ran over your bumper gets a ticket. It could be something far more serious, like wishing the co-worker who badmouthed you to the boss would get fired. Of course, there's another level of retaliation that involves serious, bodily harm. We won't go there because I want to believe anyone reading this is above that.

Still, we do want revenge. We may know we aren't supposed to want it. God takes care of those things. He told us so. But we want the satisfaction of getting back at the person who hurt or harmed us. We think we deserve it. Well, if we got what we deserved we wouldn't be living under grace right now. That's a scary thought indeed.

We also want to blame others for their misfortunes. Or lack of advancement. We blame the poor for being poor. It's a whole lot easier than recognizing that many people are poor through no fault of their own. It's a matter of birth place or economic downturn or, yes, sometimes bad choices. It could be us struggling to pay bills rather than living a comfortable financial life. That makes us uncomfortable and we lash out.

We do that alot. We lash out at others even though the Bible tells us to pray for our enemies and to help those less fortunate that ourselves. God expects us to behave like His children. Jesus showed us kindness and compassion and yet we want revenge and elevation above and away from those who don't have the material things we have. Shame on us! We can do so much better, be so much better.