Lies Destroy
A truthful witness does not deceive, but a false witness pours out lies. -- Proverbs 14:5
It was such a stupid thing. Really. She told me she wasn’t using the water from the over-full kids’ swimming pool to water her plants because the water was “too hot.” I was surprised and walked over and stuck my fingers into the cool water.
“This water’s not hot,” I told her.
She didn’t miss a beat. “Well, I didn’t want to fool with using it.”
I nodded. Fine, I thought to myself. But did you have to lie about it? Seriously? If you’ve got to lie, why not lie about something that actually matters?
I wanted to laugh but instead I shook my head and went inside. Another day, another moment, another lie. I’ve almost reached the point where I feel like I must fact-check everything she says.
Except when it’s about me. Why have I always believed her lies about me? And to me? And why do others always seem to believe her lies about me as well? I’ll probably never know.
It’s sort of like a make-it-up-as-you-go lifestyle. Is it about control? Possibly. It’s definitely about insecurity. And habit. And the need to build herself up, and put others down, so she feels better about herself. It would be sad if I wasn’t forever dealing with its aftermath.
A few months ago a sweet friend brought her two daughters to the house to see the cows. While I left to retrieve something, she told this lovely woman that “she did everything” around the house and farm. I know this because the horrified woman asked me later if it was true. I was stunned and assured her it wasn’t but, you know, the woman has never been as friendly as before.
I guess the thought that an elderly woman who work herself to death, while I let her, was more than she could get past. It wasn’t true, of course. In fact, just the opposite is true. While the woman has moments of busyness, she mostly sits in her recliner playing solitaire or doing word search puzzles. While the rest of us work, I might add.
Why do people lie? I can understand the need to spare feelings when faced with an unflattering outfit or haircut. I don’t think we always have to tell everything we know and do just because someone is nosy enough to ask us. But when the lies are silly and harmful and just so routine, then there’s a real problem there.
All of us probably have at least one or two people in our lives who are just dishonest. If you’re looking for answers from me on how to cope with it, I don’t have any. I’ve just learned to turn it over to God and let most of it go. No matter how much it hurts. And no matter how stupid it seems. And no matter what others believe.
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