January 6, 2015

Hope in the Lord

 

Why are you downcast, O my soul?

Why so disturbed within me?

Put your hope in God,

for I will yet praise Him,

my Savior and my God.

-- Psalm 42:5

Another day in darkness. The stress is almost overwhelming. Almost. I pretend all is fine. Doesn't everyone? And yet the terror of what might come lies just beneath the surface.

I am afraid. I am not supposed to be afraid. It is lack of faith. Pure and simple. The Bible tells me again and again not to fear. God is with me. I know that. I do. But it doesn't feel that way.

Feelings have a way of going haywire. They're undependable and prone to exaggeration. I list the many, many things I have to be thankful for. I am grateful. I am. And yet here I am. Worried. Overwhelmed. Because I can't see a way and so far He's refusing to even show me a glimmer of hope.

And, yet, my hope is in Him. No matter the circumstances of my life. It is what keeps me going on these tough days, when others drain my time and energy. I desperately need to focus on earning money, on supporting myself, on taking care of my needs. Why am I the only one that can see that?
Why must I continue to sacrifice myself for a person who can't see beyond herself?

The answer isn't too hard. And it likely isn't what you think. I do it because I believe God has called me to this task. She doesn't deserve it but neither do I deserve what Jesus did for me.

Will I survive it? Probably not. I'll likely one day die from something entirely treatable because I put my needs last. Isn't that what we are told to do?

My soul is downcast. But I am reminded of the words of David. My hope is in the Lord. He can make a way even though I can't see a path. I trust Him. I don't trust anyone else but I trust Him. And He is all I need.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Living Water Fills Us Up

As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God? -- Psalm 42:1-2

There’s a beautiful song that uses words from this psalm. I sing it sometimes to myself as I walk, soothing my soul with a reminder that God truly is all that matters in this world.

We humans are filled with wants. I suppose that is a natural part of who we are as sinners. We always want what we don’t have. We’re not supposed to covet but we do anyway. We want the bigger house, the nicer car, the better job, the popularity prize. And when we get it, we want something else. It’s a never-ending cycle that refuses to fill us up inside.

Somehow we believe that if we just have enough stuff, the right stuff, we won’t feel so dead and empty inside. When will we ever realize that only God can fill that emptiness up so that it overflows with joy and contentment?

God is the source of all comfort. He is the source of all peace. When we turn to Him instead of things, we are filled with gratitude and joy. No. God isn’t a vending machine. Turning to Him with our checklist of wants doesn’t mean He’s going to give us our every desire. Remember that things don’t fill us up. What fills us up is a relationship with God.

It’s easy to confuse that wish list with having a relationship. Do we really think it’s possible to have a real relationship with someone when we only turn to Him when we want something? Or need something? Because when life goes sour and we’ve exhausted all other options, we always turn to God to fix things.

There have been times in my own life that I’ve wondered if bad times were God’s way of drawing me closer to Him. It’s just so easy to believe when things are going good that we are the author of our own destinies. It’s not true. We can do nothing without God. But it’s so easy to foolishly believe we can.

I’ve learned over the years to depend on God in ways I can’t begin to describe. Good times or bad. He is my confidant and biggest cheerleader. Many times He is my only cheerleader. But He has never let me down, never refused to listen and has always given me sound advice.

I find direction through prayer, listening and through His Word. He fills me up with living water. The more I drink, the more I want. I crave that relationship, that knowledge, that connection. My soul cries out to be filled with only what He can provide

Saturday, August 21. 2010

Hope Clings To God

"Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God." -- Psalm 42:5

Hope is most alive in the midst of helplessness. That was the word that came from David Jeremiah as I traveled toward Plant Lake, Florida, yesterday.

It's a subject that touches my heart for numerous reasons. We all talk about hope. We hope in what we can not see. We believe in what we can not touch. We reach toward what others deny. We cling to hope when the world around us shatters. Hope. That very real desire and belief that something we want will happen. That our lives can recover from the disaster that surrounds us.

When life is going fine we have no need for hope. We have what we want. We're basically happy. It is when something or someone destroys our world that we cling to hope in the midst of our pain.

I was thrilled to hear Jeremiah defend those who suffer from depression. Some preachers insist that depression comes from sin. If you want to get rid of depression, get rid of the sin in your life. I once heard a christian counselor on a radio talk show say depression is nothing more than selfishness. I was -- and am -- appalled. I just prayed that no one truly in the midst of depression heard him. It scares me that this man is a christian counselor. He could do such damage because of his misguided views, turning people away from the hope God offers instead of offering them a life-saving rock.

But getting back to Jeremiah. He talked about Moses and Elijah and David, among others. All these suffered from severe depression at some point. When we read their stories, we hear the anguish of these people that God used for His purpose.

As Christians, we can't ignore the very real pain and suffering of those around us. Doing so only pushes people who need God away from Him. We can offer them hope by telling them the stories of Joseph and Daniel, Jeremiah said. We can let people suffering from depression know that God is with us in the valleys of life. He carries us when we don't have the strength to go forward. He can turn the most tragic events into good.

It is when darkness closes in around us, when despair it etched in every fiber of our being, that a kernel of hope can spring up. With God's loving hand that hope can grow stronger and stronger each day, until the light completely destroys the darkness. Hope. Such power in a four-letter word.