March 17, 2016

God Gives Us A New Heart

I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. -- Ezekiel 36:26

One of the hardest things to do after being hurt is to pick up the pieces of your heart and go on. It’s easier to wallow in bitterness and anger, cutting yourself off from others and, hopefully, not opening yourself up to being hurt again.

Some people don’t seem to have that problem. A sweet friend was devastated last year by a divorce she didn’t want. She cried that she hadn’t just lost her husband; she’d lost her best friend. It was a tough time.

Fast forward six months: She got married last week. Seriously. She met someone and it was love at first sight and she’s now married. I am amazed by her courage. Only time will tell if she was wise or foolish, but she took a chance and I admire that.

I’m not that much of a risk taker when it comes to relationships. I tend to burrow into myself. I’ve had too many broken hearts that came from too many bad choices. I tend to give people too many chances and look at the good instead of seeing the bad. And then it blows up in my face.

These days I prefer spending time with God and people I know I can trust. But sometimes I wonder if my heart has become too hard to take a chance. I don’t want that to happen. I know it isn’t a guarantee against never being hurt again. I wish it was but life just doesn’t work this way.

Here’s the thing about God: He’s good about giving us fresh starts. He’s good at mending broken hearts and making them new again. God is good at mercy and forgiveness and gives us grace when we least deserve it. God is good that way.

Me? Not so much. I can’t forget the past. Can you? When someone has wronged you, can you forget? Forgiveness for us is hard and ongoing. I wish sometimes I could be more like God. When He forgives, it is like it never was. I don’t want to remember. I don’t. But I do. I think I always will.

But I don’t want a hard heart either. I want to feel that new spirit beating inside of me. I want to love and take risks and remember what it was like not to have a broken heart.

God says He restores His children. I am holding on to that.