Friday, October 29, 2010

God Knows

"But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence in him." -- Jeremiah 17:7

Life can go from just rolling along to out of control in the time it takes to snap your fingers. It doesn't even have to be the result of something catastrophic, like a car accident or a heart attack. Sometimes it's just the gradual acknowledgment that things are changing and will never be like they were before.

I know someone out there is now reminding me that change can be a good thing. Yes, it can. It also can be a sad thing. Watching your parents grow more frail and lose vital parts of themselves is tough. I realize it's the natural progression of life. I also know I'm fortunate to have them with me (or me with them, since it's their house). I know they're actually in fairly good health for their ages. I also know that, too, is changing.

I'm fortunate that I've been able to share stories and information with friends. So many people around me are facing the same challenges. How do you increasingly become the caregiver to fiercely independent people who really do need help? How do you coax stubborn adults into seeing doctors or making lifestyle changes? It sometimes seems that they believe by ignoring what is happening, they can pretend it isn't.

I can relate to that. I don't feel my age. In my mind I am still around 30, with my entire life waiting to be lived. My reality -- when I face it -- is a road I never imagined and a body that is way slower than I ever thought possible. I, too, pretend it isn't so. But it is. So I understand denying reality. At least I do until that denial starts to make a situation worse.

One friend has a mother whose mind is slowly drifting away. Her mother doesn't realize what's happening and blames those around her. Another friend is helping her parent cope with the loss of both eyesight and mobility. Handing over car keys is agonizing, even when everyone knows it's for the best. Another man worries that his mother's health issues cause severe depression. He tries to lift her up emotionally when she becomes so upset with the limitations that come with age.

I could go on and on. I have no idea where this path will go. Just when I think I'm prepared for anything, something hits from out of nowhere. A new issue, a new challenge, a different direction for the worry I can't seem to prevent. I am so thankful, so grateful, that God is with me on this journey. Even though I don't know where I'm headed, He does. He knows how to navigate the challenges and the joys of this path. I trust Him to see me through.