Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Check Your Heart

"A poor man is shunned by all his relatives -- how much more do his friends avoid him!
-- Proverbs 19:7

Have you ever noticed that the poor relatives rarely get mentioned -- at least in the same sentence as something good. Everyone will be gathered around getting caught up, but no one brags about the son who does nonprofit work and struggles to make ends meet. No one talks about the sibling who got laid off from a job -- again.

I know a woman who barely acknowledges a brother who has struggled financially. He's one of those shoot-yourself-in-the-foot kind of guys. A real hard worker who makes the decision to go with a company that is struggling financially. Or who moves in one direction, only to have outside factors mess that up too. It's sad. A good person who has no family support. Just a history of bad choices and a longing for family to hold close.

Or the black-sheep of another family. He struggled early with drug and alcohol problems. He's been clean for years but he hasn't caught up financially with his successful siblings. And they never let him forget. They act as though they're doing him a favor just by spending time with him. He knows how they feel. They are Christians and see nothing wrong with their lack of forgiveness or acceptance for the wayward brother who turned his life around.

Want to know how people really feel about you? Lose your job and have trouble getting another one. Other people will avoid you like the plague. It's almost as though they think your misfortune will somehow taint them. Silly, I know. But true.

The invitations stop when your financial circumstances take a fall. Of course, you don't have the money for nice dinners out or trips to the coast. No one wants to hear about your job search or struggles to get by. Secretly, the people around you may wonder why you're having financial issues. They leave you to youself to sort things out, if you know what I mean.

I am forever amazed at the wisom of Solomon. The proverbs are so relevant today. I read them over and over and see people I know, including myself, reflected in them. I wish I'd memorized some of them before I learned the lesson the hard way. Others I read and apply, trying to avoid a mistake or attempting to alter my views so they are more like God's.

I want to be the person who welcomes the poor and those who have faced a few of life's struggles. I want to be compassionate and kind. I want to remember that all of us have made wrong turns of one kind or another. I want to treat others as equal to me. We all belong to God. We are uniquely created in His image. We are all worthy of love and acceptance, forgiveness and support. All of us, rich or poor. God doesn't check our bank accounts. He checks our hearts. What does yours look like?

No comments: