Move Forward In Faith
"Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the Kingdom."
-- Luke 12:32
I am afraid. I am afraid of what tomorrow might bring. I am afraid I'm not up for the challenge, that life will overwhelm me. I am so weak, so vulnerable, so raw with pain. What if I am never strong again?
Pastor Meghan tells us to turn all our "stuff" over to God. Trust Him with it. Let Him provide for our physical needs -- food, shelter, health. Trust Him to take care of our family and friends. Give Him all my fears about being alone, losing people I love and being homeless. Just trust Him. It sounds so easy. It isn't.
I know many of my fears are irrational. They stem from unexpected loss and memories that just won't fade away. So I hold back on life. I look forward with caution, uncertain of whether I should even expect it much less prepare for it.
Jesus holds out His hand. He beckons me forward, past the safety net that surrounds my solitary boat. I want to be like Peter. I want to step out in faith. I know that Jesus will catch me. I know that. I do. I also know how quickly my boat can capsize, how swiftly I can drown, frantic and alone. It is that knowledge that paralyzes me now.
"Cast all your anxieties on him because he cares for you." That's what Peter wrote in 1 Peter 5:7. I figure he knew something about anxiety. And speaking without thinking. And doing the wrong thing, at the wrong time. He understood failure and redemption and the power of knowing and believing Jesus.
I spend too much time worrying about things of this world. Many of those things I can't control. "Why do we believe what a temporary world says over what an eternal God promises," Pastor Meghan tells us. I know she is right. I want to step out in faith, to believe His promises, to trust Him with all my "stuff." Maybe today I can muster the courage I need. Maybe today I can move forward in faith.
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