September 6, 2018

You Are Never Alone

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” – Deuteronomy 31:6

There comes the time when everyone goes home. People go back to work. Friends get on with their lives. And there you are. Silence echoes within the walls of a once bustling home. You are alone.

I heard it in his voice when he called. “I just need to talk to somebody,” he said. “You seemed like a good person to do that with,” he added.

Because I’ve been there. It’s a different set of circumstances but the grief, well, it’s just the same. There’s that moment when panic begins to set in and you realize that this new normal wasn’t what you had planned at all.

We invited him out to eat. He spoke again and again of how good it was to talk to somebody. He’d only been alone just over day. We encouraged him to get involved in church, to have lunch with friends, to make an effort to get out. He knows the truth of all that. The reality? Well, it’s easier to say what you need to do than it is to actually make yourself do it.

Some people bound back from grief, or any kind of devastation, with an amazing strength. I don’t know them. That was not my journey. It isn’t my journey. Because deep grief stays with you. It changes you. It makes you know that life is full of uncertainty – with one exception.

God never leaves us alone with our pain. God never, ever turns away from our tears. God fills us up with hope and endurance when we don’t know how we’ll ever make it through the day.

God is there. Always and forever. I’ve held on to that promise so many nights, when the darkness threatened to overwhelm the resolves of the day. It’s easy to panic when you’re alone. It’s common to overreact when you’ve no one to speak truth to your pain. It’s normal to think that tomorrow could never be better than today.

He will find rest in God. He will find comfort in God alone. He will find strength to carry on through God. It’s only when we turn toward our Creator that we draw what we need to sustain life. It’s a new life. It’s a different journey. He is there.

No one can truly fix this. I sometimes think that’s why so many people turn away from grief. We want to make it better and that’s something we just can’t do. Death separates us from those we love. Through Christ’s blood, we will reunite in heaven one day. But, oh, those days between the here and the then can tear you up inside.

I watched him walk alone into the home he’d shared with her. They’d raised a family there. It was filled with memories. It was consumed with silence. Will he be okay? I don’t know. All I can do is walk beside him and remind him that he is loved by so many. All I can do is point him toward God and the promises of His Word.

When we are too weary, too lost, too alone, God carries us. It’s a truth I’ve learned along the way.