September 19, 2018

Don’t Play Favorites

My brothers and sisters, believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ must not show favoritism. – James 2:1

The air was filled with tension. Snippy comments broke the silence. One woman muttered obscenities under her breath. Another woman yelled. I shrunk into myself, trying to be as invisible as possible.

It all erupted later that day. Two women left for another workplace. Another woman was promoted to supervisor. Laughter filled the room.

The first supervisor was likely a good person. Her great sin? Playing favorites among the small staff. She created an environment where some always got the hard, sweaty jobs and her favorites always got the good jobs. There was no sharing of duties. There was no way to earn a better slot. And those who bore the weight of the hard work were tired of the situation.

None of us would have liked the situation either. No one wants to be used. It’s one thing to be a servant of Jesus. It’s something else to be treated unfairly.

But don’t we do the same thing sometimes? Don’t we assume others should be ready, willing and able to do whatever it is we need them to do, whenever we need them to do it? Sure, we do.

Consider my sweet friend who was able to be a stay at home mom. She talks about those who insist she’s got plenty of time to volunteer, to bake treats, to help out with their kids. Certainly, she does her part. She chairs a committee at church. She helps with the youth. But, as she explained one day, she didn’t choose to stay home so she could constantly do for others. She chose to spend that time with her children, to place her family first in this season of life. Others may get upset with her but I admire her determination to keep that time sacred.

A man I know has had a rough life, much of it because of poor choices. Several years ago he cleaned himself up and has really turned his life around. He’s quick to help anyone. He works whenever he has the opportunity. He volunteers at church. And, yet, there are those who still look down on him. They think more highly of those who are affluent than this man who has slowly rebuilt his life.

In this passage, James addresses that very thing. Don’t push aside the poor and give the rich the prime seats. Don’t think you’re better than someone else. Don’t look down on people who are different than you.

In other words, don’t play favorites. We will always have people in this life that we don’t really like. That’s okay. We aren’t called to like them. We are called to love them like Jesus loves them. We are called to be kind, gracious, good. Why is that so difficult for us?

Years ago a young receptionist at the company I worked for asked me why all my employees liked me when I was so mean to them. She was mortified that she’d voiced her thoughts. I just laughed. I explained that they liked me because I was fair. The written rules were applied evenly to everyone. Each employee had the opportunity to move up based on their efforts. And, I added, that’s really rare in the workplace.

It’s also really rare in life. We’re so busy trying to promote ourselves and those we like, that we miss an opportunity to reach out to someone else. We’re so focused on our own agenda that we miss the chance to learn and grow by knowing someone who maybe doesn’t see things exactly like we do.

We’re all in this life together. Let’s share it equally, with kindness and graciousness, surrounded by laughter. Life is hard enough without the extra burden of favoritism.