Stop Making Comparisons
When Peter saw him, he asked, “Lord, what about him?” Jesus answered, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.”
-- John 21:21-22
He is taking care of his very ill wife. He’s learning to cook and clean, vacuum and do laundry. All those things his stay-at-home wife has always done. Things he gladly does now for his wife.
A neighbor scoffed at his efforts. She compared him to another couple, friends of hers, who also face health issues. In that case, the wife suffers from crippling arthritis and her husband has done many of the household chores for years. Somehow this man’s sacrifice is greater because of its longevity.
I was amazed at the comments. It’s not a competition, I wanted to say. But I knew she wouldn’t get it. She wouldn’t understand. Life isn’t always a case of who does the most or who gets there first or who suffers the greatest. Both men are doing what they must for the women they love. Period.
Why do we always compare ourselves to others? We either measure up, or we don’t, based on the cars we drive, the place we live, the clothes we wear. Frequently we transfer that to our children, putting unfair pressure on them to meet our expectations of being better than everyone else.
Just the other day a man made a nasty comment about the work I was doing. “You haven’t got anything to do,” he asked with a sneer. He obviously didn’t approve of the painting I was creating. A painting I’ll eventually sell. It’s how I earn my living.
Nastiness. That’s all it is. What makes him think he works, or worked in his younger years, harder than me? Because he doesn’t and he didn’t. But somehow it makes him think higher of himself by thinking less of me. How sad is that?
I wonder sometimes if that’s why we’re so concerned with the activities and possessions of others. We think -- erroneously -- that if we put someone else down or focus on the flaws or activities of others, we can think better of ourselves. And so will everyone else. It’s a vicious cycle and no one ever wins.
Maybe that’s why Paul wrote about being content in all circumstances. When we are happy with what we have, and happy for what those around us have, then it brings a peace and joy that will otherwise allude us.
So stop comparing yourself to others. And stop comparing them to you. Everyone is different. Life is not a competition -- no matter what some would have us believe.
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